^ My mate works for Ford, he's building a 2000bhp fiesta for Ken Block who I've met and he was 8feet tall and gave me his rally gloves but I lost them in a bet with my mate who has a Ferrari etc...

Some people are such nobbers !

 

Ask them where they get their insurance.

 

When I got my classic back in '97, he prototype chav told me about just how quick is bodykitted puke green Orion (RST) was going to destroy my car

I doubt he had enough money to afford to fill it...

As for destroyed, I launched mine up the dual carriageway (just the once ) and never heard from him again.

They are funny,

dunx

P.S. My mate has a 650 bhp Subaru so there

 

The one that really annoys me is " why didn't you buy a Evo, there quicker!!!"

From somebody who has never been in a evo or impreza, yet let alone drive one!

 

Just reply ''i was going to get an Evo, but they suffer from those rotchelstrocket problems don't they''

I bet you get a ''oh yeah they do''

 

I thought they struggled with the fluffer flap sticking personally

 

They must be right bags of sh1te these Evos, I was always told to watch out for the fluffle valve on them.

 

Think everyone that drives a performance car gets it. Me and my brothe-in-law were out the other day,me in the Scoob and him in his 600bhp Skyline. Stopped for a coffee and a guy walked up to us and said "nice cars" Replied Cheers mate. He then said,my mates Peugeot 205 would kill them both. Even though he didnt know the spec of either car If all these MATES have got such quick cars why are we buying slow Impreza's?

 

LOL I had this from a lad who had solid suspension on his 205 road rally car, and claimed it handled, so I followed him out into the sticks and he couldn't shake me off ( in a bog standard classic UK turbo )... And I left him for dead on the way back into town.

He never bothered asking for seconds.

dunx

 

Rubbish, it's the flux capacitor that'll cost you, it's a trip to 1985 for one of them

 

I was advised against buying a Subaru 14 years ago due to the fact that, and I quote "You have to take the engine out to change the spark plugs"
This advise was given to me by a work colleague who's "Mate" had a Series McRae with a paddle operated sequential gearbox!

 

Having owned a dyno for decades, we do still allow ourselves a wry smile when we get one in who thinks his car is the fastest thing since Chuck Yeager broke the sound barrier. Deflation is the correct word, followed by Filibuster and Recrimination.
The trouble is, I think we are the ones who actually build the 600 bhp cars everybody is banging on about!

 

A few years ago one guy surprised me a little, I had quite a handy Sierra cossie RS500 back then and think he had listened in to our conversation in the pub about cars etc, he approached us and joined in our conversation and then mentioned his 500+bhp evo that he had, I started to think here we go but a lot he said rang true enough, he left and we both thought we would never see him again and he'd read too many magazines.
The next week on the same night ( darts night ) same guy walks in, said my evos outside if you want to have a look, well fek me, this thing was the real deal, it was an evo 5, best one in my eyes but had around 80k spent on it, quickest car ive ever been in and the first to make me throw up, turns out he was a deep sea welder who I believe earn a silly wage and he'd nothing else to spend his cash on.

 

Funniest one was when a chavvy kid came up and asked me about my car when I was outside my house, did the usual my mate has blah blah, I used to have a blah blah micra 1.0l triple turbo etc..., then asked me how fast my car was, I said 'I dont know mate, I cant go over 70 as I have 19 points on my license and I'll get a lifetime ban if I get any more'

He just nodded and said 'yeah true mate'

 

Maybe you misheard? His BM does 6mpg and he's stupid?

 

Not only drunks either.

I was getting some new tyres fitted Sunday and 3 seperate people all knew some one with a 600+ Skyline.

What makes me laugh is that they ask the power of your car before stating the figure of the Skyline. If I had said mine was 300bhp they would have said the Skyline was 400bhp! Jokers.

 

when i owned a fully stripped out 450bhp gtir with short ratio box i was told by a passing chav that his mate wanted to race me because his mate had a twin port corsa and twin port means twin turbo ! i nearly pissed myself !

 

I do know Andy, mates with him on Facebook and everything.

Rigoli is faster over the 1/4 mile, Andy is the fastest in the UK. Although I think Rigoli's is a 6 cylinder engine.