Fingers crossed (and everything else too) for you Leslie and Chris

 

this is exactly the same way my mum was in August, its kills me to read it but i am glad your mum is still with you

i thought my mum would hang on for ages and be in a sort of vegetative state for weeks. it all happened too fast for me, we got a call to say that she had passed away early in the morning. if i had realised how quickly she was going to go i wouldnt have left the hospital as i wanted to be with her at the end.
the last week was weird, mum couldnt talk much but wanted to eat food, she had a macdonalds of all things then she wouldnt eat the next day. the staff were worried that she would lose the swallow reflect and choke, but she was ok. i think she ate because she knew its what we wanted. she didnt complain at all. the only time she was unhappy was when her bum and legs went numb from lying in bed so long, once she had the air mattress she was much better. it was very hard finding my mum so sleepy all the time but i know that she was aware of what was going on even when we thought she was asleep, mums are like that

dynamix...........dont take anything for granted. each day you have your mum is a bonus. i hope to god she is still with you for it. if it was me i think i would give her a mini xmas in her room, let her see you all happy, this will make her happy. she probably knows that you all desperately want her there for christmas and as you know there is a chance she will not be, your mum probably knows this as well. it was my birhtday a few days before she died and my sons 18th the day before we lost her. she had told me that she wanted to be around for the birthdays and i think thats what she hung on for so we had a small celebration at her bedside to mark the events and she died the following morning.
i cant imagine having to organise christmas while you have all this going on but you seem upbeat and positive, i take my hat off to you

fingers crossed for everyone else as well

 

sara, was your mum aware that the end was close?

 

mum said for a long time that she knew she didnt have long left and we kept telling her that she was being silly but she was adament. we kept thinking that she was giving up. looking back that is what i regret the most...i wish i had listened to her. she knew exactly what the cancer was doing to her. listen to your mum, she knows better than anyone.

the last 3 days or so she stopped eating and was alseep constantly but would wake up if she was disturbed, then back to sleep again. this is the normal course of events for brain cancer i think

 

How true this is... read through this patricular thread on so many occasions and sat in awe at Sara's soul bearing honesty there are so many other people going through these emotions , myself included. The 'big C' in its many guises, is still a scary thing .
Dynamix is also right in saying that, yes, men *do* have emotions...
just difficult sometimes to show them..

for those that HAVE put their thoughts and emotions to *paper* as it were for us all to read, to learn from and to gain knowledge from,
THANK YOU


John.

 

when i started the thread i felt like was the only person in the world going through this. i am so glad it has given others a window to express their feelings and get information on something that is usually kept very private. i am still in shock at finding out my mum had cancer and then losing her 6 short months later!

i occasionally read through the thread just to remind myself it really happened, i still cry and get upset because my mum was such a big part of my life and now she has gone. i cant accept that i will never see my mum again. i bought her a journal to keep while she was ill. i still havnt been able to read it yet as i know that mum left little messages in there for me.

 

just had a call over the last couple of days, my Bro' in Law is now declining quite rapidly.. from a bloke that worked most his life in a foundry and was as big as a horse to now no more than a bag of bones, it just seems so wrong.. just such a waste...one side wishes him a quick painless and peaceful 'passage' but the other hopes he sticks around and is coherant enough over christmas...

 

that is truly awful - it is a hard dilemna

 

my thoughts are with you John

 

mum has taken a turn for the worse and is now not eating and hardly drinking anything either. she spends most of her time asleep (unlike me - i can hardly sleep) or staring vacantly into space unable to converse.

she hasnt eaten since wednesday but is not uncomfortable or in pain.

when we first found out that she had cancer the statistics said that 5% chance of survival for a year in those diagnosed early. she was already at stage 4 then as it has spread to the liver from the pancreas and 6 months was a most optimistic prognosis.

she has put up a hell of a fight but it is time for her to go I feel.

 

i am so sorry

your mum is ready to go, all you can do now is comfort her. she will just slip away while she is asleep. i will be thinking of you and your family this weekend. you have done everything you could have done, your mum must have been very proud of you while she has been ill and she will take that with her..........

 

I will be thinking of you both as well Dynamix, you could not have done more for her and I wish you both all the best.

Thanks for the good wishes from you all for me as well.

Les

 

Les,

dynamix and John, my thoughts are with you

 

dynamix, how is your mum? ive been thinking about her all weekend?

 

thanks sara but unfortunately my mum died in the early hours of this morning.

I spent the day with her yesterday and she had very laboured breathing and was not conscious although did stir a few times and tried to say something but couldnt make it out. She seemed very peaceful and had her complete family around her yesterday.

She had battled way beyond what the doctors had said and always remained positive and an inspiration to us all.

I will miss her loads.

 

To be able to still give inspiration to others through showing strength and courage when facing your toughest battle speaks volumes for your mother.

Thoughts are with you

 

Feel for you..........

 

Very sorry to hear this Duncan. At least she passed away with her loved ones by her side. My thoughts are with you and your family at this difficult time.
Anthony

 

So sorry to hear of your loss

 

Really sorry dynamix your mum was so brave and had everyone around her that meant something, it's just so awful that it's happened at the time of year it is.

I'll be thinking of you

rip dynamix mum

 

Thanks everyone

I know I dont know most of you from adam but it does mean a lot. Thanks

 

why does it have to hurt so much?

i am glad she went peacefully, at least she wont suffer anymore.

i sort of felt she would go this weekend, exactly the same as my mum

if you need a chat or anything i am always here ....

 

sara - when i left her yesterday I knew that was the last time I would see her alive. We had the whole family there yesterday including neices, nephews, her sister and one of her brothers. All supporting each other and trying to be happy. We did have a laugh though and all had time to say our goodbyes to mum. I know she could hear me.

She died happy knowing that we were all okay and love her.

 

at least you managed to say goodbye, which is something that will become very important to you as time goes on. i didnt get that chance because i didnt realise she was at the end.

i hope it wasnt too sad, more a relief than anything else.

youve got a lot to get through right now, youve been strong all the way through but the real test is yet to come. you will get through it and we are all thinking of you

 

I am so sorry to hear your news Dynamix. Thank goodness you were able to be with her, that must have meant an awful lot to her. My sincere commiserations, be strong although I know how difficult that can be.

Les

 

Dynamix.

I'm so sorry to hear your news. I'm glad that you were able to be there with her - I'm sure she was at peace knowing her loved ones were with her.

Keep hold of the strength that you have shown, and remember that she will always be with you.

x

 

Mister / Ms. Mix - I never understood why this thread was being bumped. Finally I read it and now I do understand.

You loved her heaps and everyone knows it

 

dynamix, my thoughts are with you
She is out of pain now and in a better place, love Lesley xx

 

I'm really sorry to hear your news

 

just read through/caught up with this thread once again,. sat here now with a tear in my eye and a lump in my throat... My heart goes out to you and yours as i understand what your going through (probably to a slightly lesser degree, but ill understand fully soon enough)..

John