scoobimax

You're either brave or stupid in these minus god knows what temperatures!

Don't answer that, I have a sneaky feeling I already know the answer

Ubik

Washed it. And yes it was cold but I know theres no other time I can do it this week.


No longer can you call me the poo mobile. Its no longer a poo, more of a dropping.

Alloys are still ditched - covered in brake dust. The rest is 'almost' clean but not quite good enough.

Well its got the worst off it.

scoobimax

Perhaps you shall be known as Brother Half A Job, bastion of the half clean chariot

Was any sustenance needed through this cleaning odeal to keep energy levels up, 4 rounds of toast over here quick - this man is in need of reviving!

All hail the toast, lest we forget it's importance to life itself

Brother Max

Ubik

Right thats it you set of cleanest gits!!!

I am going to goto work on Saturday (a rest day from the gym) and I am going to wash and wax the car.

HAPPY NOW???????

scoobimax

I would ensure the ambient temperature is of the correct level before you embark upon a waxing expedition. Too cold and you will rue the decision to undertake such a task.

And Brother Ubik, remember to turn the other toast, like his Toastiness has done over the weekends races.

Brother Max

Ubik

Indeed his Toastyness sets an example to us all.


The truth be told I wash the car everyweek, its just I have had a few things happen to stop me doing it.

I do keep it clean normally. I will be comming in on Saturday to give it a proper wash and hoover as my hose pipe in my garage is covered by a big pile of stuff from my dads move. (storing things for him at the moment until he finds somewhere to live)

Its slowly returning to red mica.

The alloys need extra work, most of the mud is off it but its covered in brake dust. Wonder wheels and some scrubbing, it will be show room condition (apart from the scratch) on sunday!

scoobimax

I am pleased to hear this. I thought we had lost on of our flock. See what happens when you stray in to the Kindgom of Chav Witness - agression and defensive tones become the norm.

Be at peace with the world and your fellow Fellows

Brother Max
(AKA the Lesser Spotted Off Silver Chuff)

Ubik

Amendment to title. You were spotted twice as was Brother Envy.


He does know that no one is actually green with envy doesn't he? Were green because its like sea sickness.

A wagon?


Agree with the twin pea shooters comment though. Hes spot on that man is!

greenwithenvy

Once again my slumber has been disturbed by you lesser booted mortals. What are you trying to do to me, I have already posted twice this year!!

Definition - saloon:

'motor car with closed body and no partition behind driver'

This clearly means a vehicle of lower class, not worthy of toast of any variety, ie a vehicle pertaining to the levels of chavdom worthy of said donut roundabout

wagon:

a trusty workhorse (steed/stallion/thoroughbred) capable of pulling heavy loads (huge amounts of torque)

This clearly speaks for itself fellow bretheren.

Long live fried bread for that is the true measure of a king!

Ubik

You must have been going to the doughnut then!


Try not to pull any of them, I know you can't move as fast as them in your wagon but at least try dear chap!

scoobimax

On the basis of friendship, work colleague and car share hopo I feel compelled to jump to my esteemed fellow netter and toast devotee GreenWithEnvy's defence...............but as he chose the more sedate shooting break - he lives by the sword, dies bythe sword.

Definitions found:

Saloon = US bar serving drinks; more expensive bar in a pub; superior road going vehicle chosen by the more discerning driver for speed and agility
Estate = car with rear door and luggage space behind the rear seats; slower load lugging contraption not usually aware of style or desirability
Wagon = four-wheeled vehicle for carrying heavy loads slowly, railway freight truck; usually driven by the country set or antique dealers not fussed on drivability of a vehicle.

make your own minds up folks!

Ubik

Has that piccy gone up on the notice board at work yet?

Ubik

The man likes dual pea shooters, that makes him a god among men in my books.


Chief Diety of Exhaust back box taste (and god of Wagons)

greenwithenvy

Indeed permit me to look down from my lofty position and inject a little humour, as is my right, for although I am Chief Deity of Exhaust back box taste, this does not make me a purveyor of back boxes so to speak!!!!

A joke if you will - " As a saloon and therfore angular and dare I say boxy - does this make yours a Ubiks Cube??!!"

Couldn't resist Brother U.

scoobimax

sorry lads, bl00dy fire alarm's just been off. Spent the last 20 minutes freezing my nuts off round the back of the old Jessops hospital!!

PMSL


small circulation but not yet on a notice board. We work in different buildings so may have to find a friendly source to print and mount (ooh er mrs)

Max

Ubik

Indeed yes Brother Envy but also indeed no. For mine is a bugeye as most curved and smooth car as any god could wish for.

Not like those boxy classics. But as you will, from this day forth the red mica poo mobile will be known as the Ubiks cube.




Brother Toast tells me that such women can be found on or at a place called the Doughnut. I have only heard of such a place discussed in whispers. Not once have I ventured to it nor looked for it on ye old map.

If your need is great the doughnut could be the place you belong.

matt-j-scooby

a gods car indeed, but i wish i had'nt washed it at the weekend it was freezing and i have never known a car to get so dirty so quickly it had half of the countryside attached to sides and wheel arches, now i know why you all put of washing your cars

scoobimax

Brother Cube , I fear I have decoded the user name of Brother Envy. Tis irony - it's brother Envy who is indeed envious with the greenness - hankering himself after the far superior saloon!


Perhaps he should be known as Brother BoB now - Bastion of BackBoxes!! Now that's how rumours start. Are you jealous Sebastien (the PM's civil servant PA)?

scoobimax

I think we may have another convert to Toastish. On my may home tonight I happened upon fledgling Brother Deano555 who has been observing from afar.

We had a deep and meanigful discussion on the origins of our chosen Toast path.

My inckling (sp?) is that he is there for convincing and could perhaps do with some encouragement from the fellows.

Children please show a warm blessing to welcome Brother Deano amongst us.

I'm sure he will break his vow of silence and utter some profound view as yet unheard in the Land of his Holiness, Toast.

But brother Deano be warned though of the temptation of the donut. Do not venture there post the Yellow Orb unless seeking a safe(ish) haven for your blue chariot when frequenting ale houses, food halls or other such outlets.

It is a richeous path to choose and once chosen you will feel enlightenment and enrichment to your life.

Come join this growing band.

Brother "Frequently More Spotted Off Silver Chuff!"

Daft Lad

Brother Deano! Not seen you since the Chessie meet last month mate, I am very interested to know your feelings towards Toast!

Max, I am very impressed every time you mention Toast you use the approved capital letter, I am very proud!

Ubik

Welcome Brother Deano!

Brother Matt are you comming up to the pub so the others may worship our bugeyed mobiles?

This has the uncanny ring of truth about it. Indeed from this day forth the man who drives the green wagon and wears the hat of Toast shall be known as Brother BoB.


Edited to add: The cube is a little bit dirty again but will be washed throughly for sunday!

greenwithenvy

Welcome brother Deano

...and I refer you all once again to the good book:

For there was once a stricken white GL who had unwittingly chanced upon a den of iniquity known to all brothers as the 'donut'. "Help I need toast" was his cry. At this point a gleaming classic silver saloon quietly rumbled by, ignoring his fellow brother for fear of she that must be obeyed.
As his pangs grew and he became weaker, the fainter the cry of toast became, but who should happen upon him but a filthy mica red bugeye saloon. "Flee thee beneath me for I am here to rub shoulders with the chavs and ride merrily off with them to the land of MaxPower"

As desperation grew and the yellow orb had departed. along came a green wagon, a peasant was he described by the bretheren and yet thick farmhouse white toast did he possess.

He shared his crusty loaf with the stricken GL driver and saw him happily on his way.

So the moral here - while saloons have boots, they were not made for walking all over everyone!!!!!

Brother BoB the God of Backboxes has spoken - amen!!

scoobimax

Quietly - you really should not judge others by your own twin peasantshooter standards.

for fear of she that must be obeyed - you HAVE met the wife and therefore are well placed to judge the truth of this matter. The ruling authority is not one to be challenged openly, but handled in a more subtle manner.

thick farmhouse white - as befits the peasant's underclass, processed ready sliced goods prevail in your mudhut. The only toast worthy of the aforementioned GL Driver, the not so well known brother of the famous Mini (i know that's not how you spell her name but continues the car theme!), is that of the freshly baked uncut Bloomer. This should be cut & toasted before Him, liberally garnished with butter, desired topping and offerred on bended knee.

The real moral of this fable is beware of peasants and their work wagons for they are secretly trying to get their hands on GL's more desirable SALOON. You will note that GL quickly realised the inferior produce bestowed up on him by this chancer of a peasant was a ploy to steel his steed and moved on before the sneak thief could grab the keys. Always beware of the envious peasant known as BoB.

True enlightenment is found a little further beneath the surface than first meets the eye!

greenwithenvy

Brother Max thou shall repent and say 20 hail wagons!!

The time has come for prayer fellow bretheren, nothing else can be done, kneel and repeat after me :

Our father who art in wagon
Hallowed be thy name
Thy kingdom come, thy will be done
On earth as it is in Chessie
Give us this day our daily bread (thick, crusty, farmhouse, ladies underpants type)
And forgive us our saloons
As we forgive those who drive saloons against us
For thine is the kingdom
The power of the wagon
For ever and ever
Amen

Brother Bob

scoobimax

This is no Hail Wagon, for sure it is more like The Lords Wagon, is it not?

You need to study more my child, take yourself off to a quiet room and read the preachings of Our Lord Toast.

Ubik

Indeed he does!

The term "a filthy mica red bugeye saloon" shows a narrow view of religious doctrine, adhesion to cleanlyness at all costs such that one should not drive ones car for fear of getting it mucky even temporarly. I think this heritic is some kind of fundamentalist who probably burns Toast for fun in his spare time and conducts experiments with the holy substance, dropping it face down on the floor for example.

We should support our Brother BoB as he clearly needs help, not just because of his choise of steed but also the clearly delusional state he occupies most of the time. (The cause of his wagon fetish)

We must comfort our friend in his time of crisis for one day he will be returned to sanity and not reject the way of the saloon.

scoobimax

Wise words which show a maturity seldom seen on such young shoulders Brother Cube.

You speak much sense and offer a forgiving shoulder for Brother Envy to rest his delusional head to cry on.

greenwithenvy

You have failed again brothers, the words you were looking for were 'crumbs of comfort'!!

Remember the words from the good book:

'..and so it came to pass (referring to a wagon overtaking a saloon) that God created women, and they did choose saloons as pretty symmetrical things good for carrying shopping'

Calm thy self Brother Bob I detect a hint of hatred in thy thoughts. I must resist, do not fall to the dark side, don't do it.....aaaargh, aaaaaaaaaaaaargh, saloons, saloons, I want a saloo......

Click - back in the room.

It was all a nasty dream, those naughty brothers planting awful thoughts in your mind with their red horned saloons - they shall be banished to the donut after the yellow orb has hidden itself!!!

Brother Bob

Ubik

Brother Bob is slowly gaining a post count now, look after nearly thirty years he has managed twelve.

He likes the slow pace of life which is why he has bought the quiet retiring 'just nipping to the shops for some tea bags' type of car.
He must be forgiven his folly!

And women did choose saloons? OF COURSE THEY DID!


Have you ever met a woman that was wrong? Ever? Ever ever?


Yours happily from a saloon coverted by women! (I wish)

Brother Cube

kjegg89

Just to throw my twopenneth in how do u lot get away with not doing any work at work, and scoobynettin all the time???????

Praise to the Toast