Stampede !!!
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Originally Posted by STi wanna Subaru
Tel - http://bbs.scoobynet.co.uk/showthread.php?t=206191
etc
Last edited by MattW; Jan 25, 2006 at 11:26 AM.
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From: God's promised land
That's not the full length one though. People will think i'm mad going on about it on the basis of that! Do we know where the proper version is, with the garden centre visits etc? 
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From: rushden, northants
Originally Posted by Norman D. Landing
Driving to work this morning and came to a spot where at least once a week I have to wait whilst a farmer walks his herd of cows either to or from the milking shed along about 500 yards of road.
Predictably there they were, bunch of dopey looking fat ba$t4rds idling their way along with the farmer driving a small tractor behin them keeping them moving.
Then it happened, 2 or 3 cows had gone past my car when once moo-ing son of a heiffer stood looking at my bonnet directly in front of the car and decides to jump up !!!!
The stupid cud chewing freezer full of steaks-to-be put both front legs up and totally ferked my bonnet!!!
I was the only car waiting at the time and there was nothing behind me so fearing that the flea infested, 6 titted f*ckwit was going for all 4 legs I panicked, rammed it in reverse and shot backwards !
Well next thing, the dozey fat big dopey eyed **** sprayer falls flat on it's chest with it's legs sprawled out in front of it and didnt get up. I get out of the car to check my bonnet (predictably dented and scratched) when the farmer comes running along screaming at me about how I've intentionally injured his cow.
The cow is still on the floor looking like something .......well........stupid, and breathing quite heavily. Farmer Joe tells me he's going to report me, I tell him to **** off and think himself luckty that I didnt slam it in first and finish the job!!
He rants that the cow will have to be put down and I'm going to be billed for the price of the cow and the vet's time, I tell him that I'm reporting him to the police for blocking a public highway and NEVER cleaning up all the **** afterwards !
He goes mental and starts threatening me so I got back in the car. He walks along to the car and yet again I panic, I hit the horn and flashed the lights at the rest of the herd and they all go ballistic and this is where the stampede starts, luckily they all turn and leg it the other way, god knows what would have happened if the bunch of mangy, **** covered reekers had run in my direction. I reversed back to a junction, turned round and went a different way to work with Farmer Joe running after his brainless chums.
I haven't done anything about it yet apart from book the car in for a look at the damage and get a quote.
Does anybody know where I stand legally here ?? Is the farmer entitled to block the road every day ? Are they insured ?
Help ?
Predictably there they were, bunch of dopey looking fat ba$t4rds idling their way along with the farmer driving a small tractor behin them keeping them moving.
Then it happened, 2 or 3 cows had gone past my car when once moo-ing son of a heiffer stood looking at my bonnet directly in front of the car and decides to jump up !!!!
The stupid cud chewing freezer full of steaks-to-be put both front legs up and totally ferked my bonnet!!!
I was the only car waiting at the time and there was nothing behind me so fearing that the flea infested, 6 titted f*ckwit was going for all 4 legs I panicked, rammed it in reverse and shot backwards !
Well next thing, the dozey fat big dopey eyed **** sprayer falls flat on it's chest with it's legs sprawled out in front of it and didnt get up. I get out of the car to check my bonnet (predictably dented and scratched) when the farmer comes running along screaming at me about how I've intentionally injured his cow.
The cow is still on the floor looking like something .......well........stupid, and breathing quite heavily. Farmer Joe tells me he's going to report me, I tell him to **** off and think himself luckty that I didnt slam it in first and finish the job!!
He rants that the cow will have to be put down and I'm going to be billed for the price of the cow and the vet's time, I tell him that I'm reporting him to the police for blocking a public highway and NEVER cleaning up all the **** afterwards !
He goes mental and starts threatening me so I got back in the car. He walks along to the car and yet again I panic, I hit the horn and flashed the lights at the rest of the herd and they all go ballistic and this is where the stampede starts, luckily they all turn and leg it the other way, god knows what would have happened if the bunch of mangy, **** covered reekers had run in my direction. I reversed back to a junction, turned round and went a different way to work with Farmer Joe running after his brainless chums.
I haven't done anything about it yet apart from book the car in for a look at the damage and get a quote.
Does anybody know where I stand legally here ?? Is the farmer entitled to block the road every day ? Are they insured ?
Help ?
fpmsl quality!!
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From:
After re-reading this one I popped off and searched for the tweaky thread, I forgot how much attention that thread generated...
Did we ever find out who tweaky was?
And what did happen in the end between him and his evil mrs?
Did we ever find out who tweaky was?
And what did happen in the end between him and his evil mrs?
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From: Next door to the WiFi connection
Oh sod it, wasnt Astraboy by any chance was it?
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stonking post NDL. i have no advice to offer but wish you the best of all outcomes.
yer a natural story-teller - was it you who posted the immortal experience with a g/f's father, the voicebox, the dalek flashback and the choking fit a couple of years ago?
that was the funniest post i've ever read on here. this is the second. good work fella!
yer a natural story-teller - was it you who posted the immortal experience with a g/f's father, the voicebox, the dalek flashback and the choking fit a couple of years ago?
that was the funniest post i've ever read on here. this is the second. good work fella!
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From: Never do names esp. Joey, spaz or Mong
stonking post NDL. i have no advice to offer but wish you the best of all outcomes.
yer a natural story-teller - was it you who posted the immortal experience with a g/f's father, the voicebox, the dalek flashback and the choking fit a couple of years ago?
that was the funniest post i've ever read on here. this is the second. good work fella!
yer a natural story-teller - was it you who posted the immortal experience with a g/f's father, the voicebox, the dalek flashback and the choking fit a couple of years ago?
that was the funniest post i've ever read on here. this is the second. good work fella!
