Welcome to New Britain
31 August 2001, 05:12 PM
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The following is an open letter to the UK government. It's based on Labour's ideas about "Cool Britannia" and "New Britain."
Come to Britain where our railways are the oldest in Europe, and the drivers regularly pass red signals. Marvel at the chances of being killed in one of our two annual loss-of-life train crashes. That is, if you can get a train in the first place....or if you can afford the journey. Our prices go up 25% each year, you know. We're proud to have the most expensive rail fares on the planet now. But the money is going to good use. We're not investing in safety equipment (TPWS or ATP - both would save lives, but they cost too much), nor training, nor hiring new staff. In fact, the staff we have think they're so underpaid, they're on strike regularly. And those that aren't on strike can't be bothered to turn up for work a lot of the time. Honestly, the railways would run so much better if it wasn't for those blasted passengers!
Never mind. You could always enjoy a day out on the rest of our public transport system that is in terminal decay. You may not plan it to be a day out, but that's how long it will take you to get wherever it is you want to go. If the transport still serves that destination of course. We're modernising, streamlining, centralising and making the system cost efficient. (That means: we've closed your nearest station).
Drive on our roads which are permanently clogged and polluted. Make the most of it if you decide to take a drive into our beautiful countryside, because once you've parked your car, it will get stolen. Britain is proud to be the car crime capital of the world, you know.
Still, no worry. You can buy another car and pay 35% more for it than any other country in Europe, then you can fill it with British petrol and pay 450% tax on that (plus the extra 17.5% "value added" tax too). If you manage to keep your car, ensure you have a big bank account as you are likely to get caught on a speed camera for no reason. If you don't have the money to pay though, just make up an excuse, but be aware that this only works if you're a famous person or if you're a serving politician.
Visit London's Heathrow or Gatwick Shopping Malls. And if you happen to be there, why not catch a flight to somewhere (they used to be airports). Then you can fly our friendly skies, but make sure your life insurance is paid up because we're about to privatise air traffic control. (Fares will go up, planes will come crashing down). But be quick on the life insurance thing too - if you delay too long, genetic testing will preclude you from any life insurance at all.
Come and eat our BSE-infected beef. That is if there are any beef cattle left - we centralised all our slaughterhouses you know, and for some reason, a foot-and-mouth outbreak spread across the country like wildfire. How strange. Alternatively you could enjoy our national dish of Indian curry or catch food poisoning from one of our many unlicensed, illegal-immigrant fast-food street vendors in London.
Speaking of illegal immigrants, if you choose to move to England, make sure you don't tell the government. If you do, you'll end up paying that irksome income tax thing. Instead, why not join the other 1400 or so new illegal immigrants a day that flood into our country? You'll be well looked after - the honest taxpayers will be paying for your benefits despite the fact that you're working and not paying any tax yourself. And if you can put on a convincing enough accent, you'll probably get free housing too.
See the quaint British children playing in the streets, with knives, and drug needles. Watch as they stab each other to death or abduct even smaller children then torture them and throw them onto rail lines. If you have children of your own, make sure you keep them indoors though. The government don't think you have a right to know if a raging paedophile lives next door to you - apparently it's not in your interest to know if your child is safe. But how safe can you be? If you try to vaccinate your child as every parent should, the MMR vaccine has a 1 in 100 chance of making your child autistic. You could ask for the vaccines separately, but that would be silly and indicate that you clearly don't know what you're talking about. And because you don't know what you're talking about, the government obviously won't entertain the idea of giving you the choice. Never mind - you can at least rely on your kids getting a good education. I mean where else can you send your child to schools that are closed for one day a week? We all understand that underpaid teachers in classes of 40 or more are the key to a fine education system. And at the top end of that education system, our government has devised a superb method of launching our country's new talent into the working world with staggering debts courtesy of the university grant system. It's clearly the most responsible method of setting people on their career path, by introducing them to crippling debt before they've even got a job. Much better than using the taxpayer's money to pay for education thus ensuring our country's future.
Wander idly around our city centres, where crime is up 20% year on year, where you'll likely be mugged for your mobile phone or watch. Despite appearing on one of our myriad of CCTV cameras, the mugger will no doubt get away with it, and sue you for the inconvenience of having to mug you in the first place. Be wary of suspicious packages in town though. Through years of indifference by the government, the IRA have free reign to plant bombs in dustbins in major shopping areas. They're also pretty nifty at bombing military bases by disguising their weapons as household objects like torches. And they're a dab hand at stuffing trucks full of chemical fertiliser explosive and destroying office blocks.
Speaking of dustbins, you must ensure you never use one. As you play dodge-the-doggie-do, you ought to notice just how much trash there is blowing around the city streets in England. We do have street sweepers, but they're all underpaid and undermotivated, and tend not to go out when it's too wet or too hot. We all enjoy dropping litter within feet of a dustbin but not actually putting it in. That way, we can ensure that all manner of nastiness is blowing around when the wind gets up - sand, dried faeces, papers, leaves and wrappers. That is, if they're not stuck to the pavement with one of the billions of globs of freshly spat-out chewing gum.....
Don't value your privacy too much in England, as you're likely to be filmed 200 times today. There's reckoned to be one CCTV camera per every 250 citizens, Mr. Orwell. And with advances in technology like the Mandrake/FaceIT facial recognition system (capable of recognising 1100 faces a second from live CCTV feeds), the government and police can now track you by name, wherever you go, without you even knowing it. Don't think that speaking
on your mobile ensure privacy either. Widespread cellular network monitoring, recording and surveillance systems ensure every word you speak is recorded for later analysis. Just like the Echelon system based at Menwith Hill that monitors all your email and regular land-line phone conversations and faxes.
Think you'll be safe in your own car? Not really. Thanks to a network of traffic-monitoring cameras called Trafficmaster, your numberplate will be read every time you pass one of their cameras. Should anyone want to know where your car is, they can query a database which in turn can determine which Trafficmaster camera you last drove past, and when.
Buy a house using our fantastic new "Home-buyers packs". This little marvel is being introduced to make the sale of property easier. Rather than you, the buyer having to go through that irksome procedure of having a survey done, you can rely on the honest seller to have it prepared for you. After all, there's no conflict of interest between someone wanting to sell a house, and getting a survey done that paints the same house in a gleaming light. That would be daft and unrealistic.
Should you have the misfortune to find burglars in your newly acquired house, don't defend yourself. If you do, you'll end up in jail. Farmer Tony Martin found this out the hard way. After being burgled repeatedly by the same youths, he shot one of them in self defence when he discovered them in his house once again. He was jailed for his trouble. And for heaven's sake don't own a licensed gun. If you do, you'll be held responsible for every gun crime in the country. Think for a moment how our wise government banned all licensed firearms to prevent another school shooting, and then seemed to miss the irony of gun crime rising twofold year-on-year after the ban came into effect. Surely that couldn't mean that it's black-market guns and criminals that are causing these problems?
And what about those burglars? How come the police didn't find them? Don't be silly - that would imply the police were well paid and on the beat. As everyone knows, centralised, demoralised, underpaid police in cars are a far better solution to crime on the streets than beat bobbys. Apart from that, they're all so busy persecuting motorists for speeding that you can't expect them to spend any time looking for real criminals. Not at the moment anyway. In a year's time though when privatised police forces come into existence, you can pay to have your neighbourhood policed. If you like the idea of shares, you might even be able to buy shares in the local security forces thus ensuring that you get better coverage than the rest of us who naively expect policing to be paid for out of our taxes. How daft we all are.
Go shopping and delight at being served by teenage staff with no motivation and no training. The customer service is invariably so good that you'll be invited to watch the assistants picking their noses/spots whilst they ignore you in favour of discussing Sharon's latest sexual escapade with Kevin. If you do manage to get their attention, ensure you have no fixed idea of what it is you want, because they won't have it in the size/shape/colour/specification you want anyway. You could shop around for the best price, but long-established retail cartels will ensure that everything is exactly the same over-inflated price wherever you go.
If you fall ill, don't worry about coming into one of our hospitals. If it's not been closed down, the doctors will only have been on duty for 28 hours with no sleep, and the nurses will attend your every need on their ultra-low salaries. And once you're admitted, there's only a 1 in 4000 chance you'll actually never leave after contracted a superbug from our hospitals and dying. Oh - one more thing - if you're planning to die, try not to leave anything to your loved ones - the government will dip in and take 40% of it if you do.
Enjoy our fine art galleries which contain such wonderful pieces as cows and sheep cut in half, and beds covered in faeces and vomit. But don't try to use the "Bridge Of Light" pedestrian footbridge across the Thames to get to the Tate Modern - it can't handle pedestrians. And what about some of the rest of our architectural prowess? The "British" Millenium Wheel, manufactured in Switzerland, Czechoslovakia, France and Italy, then assembled by Germans with assistance from the Dutch. The tunnel under our major airport that collapsed because nobody thought to shore it up. The high-speed rail link to the channel tunnel that is still in review even though it's 10 years late. The Millenium Dome - need I say more?
Spare a passing thought for our fantastic heritage in the fine art of shipbuilding. Mourn briefly as you consider how it's been so underfunded for so long that even our own
shipping companies are now owned by the Americans, ordering their ships from Germany. Speaking of manufacturing, you ought to spend a few moments pondering how we managed to so efficiently sell off our motoring heritage too. The few remnants that are left (Ford in Dagenham, and Vauxhall in Luton) are currently being seen off by the government, so don't worry too much about that discrepancy.
At the end of the day though, you can settle back into your leather sofa (if the company you bought it from didn't go bust for the third time and run off with your money), and watch a little television. You can enjoy the delights of paying the government a tax for decoding radio waves, and then watch an evening's entertainment filled with political debate, guns, murder, death and violence. After the news though, you can watch political debate, guns, murder, death and violence. Or you could pop on a CD or DVD that cost you 50% more than it would anywhere else in the world, because you have the priveledge of living on Treasure Island. If you get bored, you might spend a little time surfing the 'net for entertainment. Our phone rates are very reasonable and your quarterly phone bill will only be about twice as much as most other countries in Europe. Your 'free' internet connection will not cost much either, only an extra £15 a month.
<B> Yes, come to New Britain. </B>
Come to Britain where our railways are the oldest in Europe, and the drivers regularly pass red signals. Marvel at the chances of being killed in one of our two annual loss-of-life train crashes. That is, if you can get a train in the first place....or if you can afford the journey. Our prices go up 25% each year, you know. We're proud to have the most expensive rail fares on the planet now. But the money is going to good use. We're not investing in safety equipment (TPWS or ATP - both would save lives, but they cost too much), nor training, nor hiring new staff. In fact, the staff we have think they're so underpaid, they're on strike regularly. And those that aren't on strike can't be bothered to turn up for work a lot of the time. Honestly, the railways would run so much better if it wasn't for those blasted passengers!
Never mind. You could always enjoy a day out on the rest of our public transport system that is in terminal decay. You may not plan it to be a day out, but that's how long it will take you to get wherever it is you want to go. If the transport still serves that destination of course. We're modernising, streamlining, centralising and making the system cost efficient. (That means: we've closed your nearest station).
Drive on our roads which are permanently clogged and polluted. Make the most of it if you decide to take a drive into our beautiful countryside, because once you've parked your car, it will get stolen. Britain is proud to be the car crime capital of the world, you know.
Still, no worry. You can buy another car and pay 35% more for it than any other country in Europe, then you can fill it with British petrol and pay 450% tax on that (plus the extra 17.5% "value added" tax too). If you manage to keep your car, ensure you have a big bank account as you are likely to get caught on a speed camera for no reason. If you don't have the money to pay though, just make up an excuse, but be aware that this only works if you're a famous person or if you're a serving politician.
Visit London's Heathrow or Gatwick Shopping Malls. And if you happen to be there, why not catch a flight to somewhere (they used to be airports). Then you can fly our friendly skies, but make sure your life insurance is paid up because we're about to privatise air traffic control. (Fares will go up, planes will come crashing down). But be quick on the life insurance thing too - if you delay too long, genetic testing will preclude you from any life insurance at all.
Come and eat our BSE-infected beef. That is if there are any beef cattle left - we centralised all our slaughterhouses you know, and for some reason, a foot-and-mouth outbreak spread across the country like wildfire. How strange. Alternatively you could enjoy our national dish of Indian curry or catch food poisoning from one of our many unlicensed, illegal-immigrant fast-food street vendors in London.
Speaking of illegal immigrants, if you choose to move to England, make sure you don't tell the government. If you do, you'll end up paying that irksome income tax thing. Instead, why not join the other 1400 or so new illegal immigrants a day that flood into our country? You'll be well looked after - the honest taxpayers will be paying for your benefits despite the fact that you're working and not paying any tax yourself. And if you can put on a convincing enough accent, you'll probably get free housing too.
See the quaint British children playing in the streets, with knives, and drug needles. Watch as they stab each other to death or abduct even smaller children then torture them and throw them onto rail lines. If you have children of your own, make sure you keep them indoors though. The government don't think you have a right to know if a raging paedophile lives next door to you - apparently it's not in your interest to know if your child is safe. But how safe can you be? If you try to vaccinate your child as every parent should, the MMR vaccine has a 1 in 100 chance of making your child autistic. You could ask for the vaccines separately, but that would be silly and indicate that you clearly don't know what you're talking about. And because you don't know what you're talking about, the government obviously won't entertain the idea of giving you the choice. Never mind - you can at least rely on your kids getting a good education. I mean where else can you send your child to schools that are closed for one day a week? We all understand that underpaid teachers in classes of 40 or more are the key to a fine education system. And at the top end of that education system, our government has devised a superb method of launching our country's new talent into the working world with staggering debts courtesy of the university grant system. It's clearly the most responsible method of setting people on their career path, by introducing them to crippling debt before they've even got a job. Much better than using the taxpayer's money to pay for education thus ensuring our country's future.
Wander idly around our city centres, where crime is up 20% year on year, where you'll likely be mugged for your mobile phone or watch. Despite appearing on one of our myriad of CCTV cameras, the mugger will no doubt get away with it, and sue you for the inconvenience of having to mug you in the first place. Be wary of suspicious packages in town though. Through years of indifference by the government, the IRA have free reign to plant bombs in dustbins in major shopping areas. They're also pretty nifty at bombing military bases by disguising their weapons as household objects like torches. And they're a dab hand at stuffing trucks full of chemical fertiliser explosive and destroying office blocks.
Speaking of dustbins, you must ensure you never use one. As you play dodge-the-doggie-do, you ought to notice just how much trash there is blowing around the city streets in England. We do have street sweepers, but they're all underpaid and undermotivated, and tend not to go out when it's too wet or too hot. We all enjoy dropping litter within feet of a dustbin but not actually putting it in. That way, we can ensure that all manner of nastiness is blowing around when the wind gets up - sand, dried faeces, papers, leaves and wrappers. That is, if they're not stuck to the pavement with one of the billions of globs of freshly spat-out chewing gum.....
Don't value your privacy too much in England, as you're likely to be filmed 200 times today. There's reckoned to be one CCTV camera per every 250 citizens, Mr. Orwell. And with advances in technology like the Mandrake/FaceIT facial recognition system (capable of recognising 1100 faces a second from live CCTV feeds), the government and police can now track you by name, wherever you go, without you even knowing it. Don't think that speaking
on your mobile ensure privacy either. Widespread cellular network monitoring, recording and surveillance systems ensure every word you speak is recorded for later analysis. Just like the Echelon system based at Menwith Hill that monitors all your email and regular land-line phone conversations and faxes.
Think you'll be safe in your own car? Not really. Thanks to a network of traffic-monitoring cameras called Trafficmaster, your numberplate will be read every time you pass one of their cameras. Should anyone want to know where your car is, they can query a database which in turn can determine which Trafficmaster camera you last drove past, and when.
Buy a house using our fantastic new "Home-buyers packs". This little marvel is being introduced to make the sale of property easier. Rather than you, the buyer having to go through that irksome procedure of having a survey done, you can rely on the honest seller to have it prepared for you. After all, there's no conflict of interest between someone wanting to sell a house, and getting a survey done that paints the same house in a gleaming light. That would be daft and unrealistic.
Should you have the misfortune to find burglars in your newly acquired house, don't defend yourself. If you do, you'll end up in jail. Farmer Tony Martin found this out the hard way. After being burgled repeatedly by the same youths, he shot one of them in self defence when he discovered them in his house once again. He was jailed for his trouble. And for heaven's sake don't own a licensed gun. If you do, you'll be held responsible for every gun crime in the country. Think for a moment how our wise government banned all licensed firearms to prevent another school shooting, and then seemed to miss the irony of gun crime rising twofold year-on-year after the ban came into effect. Surely that couldn't mean that it's black-market guns and criminals that are causing these problems?
And what about those burglars? How come the police didn't find them? Don't be silly - that would imply the police were well paid and on the beat. As everyone knows, centralised, demoralised, underpaid police in cars are a far better solution to crime on the streets than beat bobbys. Apart from that, they're all so busy persecuting motorists for speeding that you can't expect them to spend any time looking for real criminals. Not at the moment anyway. In a year's time though when privatised police forces come into existence, you can pay to have your neighbourhood policed. If you like the idea of shares, you might even be able to buy shares in the local security forces thus ensuring that you get better coverage than the rest of us who naively expect policing to be paid for out of our taxes. How daft we all are.
Go shopping and delight at being served by teenage staff with no motivation and no training. The customer service is invariably so good that you'll be invited to watch the assistants picking their noses/spots whilst they ignore you in favour of discussing Sharon's latest sexual escapade with Kevin. If you do manage to get their attention, ensure you have no fixed idea of what it is you want, because they won't have it in the size/shape/colour/specification you want anyway. You could shop around for the best price, but long-established retail cartels will ensure that everything is exactly the same over-inflated price wherever you go.
If you fall ill, don't worry about coming into one of our hospitals. If it's not been closed down, the doctors will only have been on duty for 28 hours with no sleep, and the nurses will attend your every need on their ultra-low salaries. And once you're admitted, there's only a 1 in 4000 chance you'll actually never leave after contracted a superbug from our hospitals and dying. Oh - one more thing - if you're planning to die, try not to leave anything to your loved ones - the government will dip in and take 40% of it if you do.
Enjoy our fine art galleries which contain such wonderful pieces as cows and sheep cut in half, and beds covered in faeces and vomit. But don't try to use the "Bridge Of Light" pedestrian footbridge across the Thames to get to the Tate Modern - it can't handle pedestrians. And what about some of the rest of our architectural prowess? The "British" Millenium Wheel, manufactured in Switzerland, Czechoslovakia, France and Italy, then assembled by Germans with assistance from the Dutch. The tunnel under our major airport that collapsed because nobody thought to shore it up. The high-speed rail link to the channel tunnel that is still in review even though it's 10 years late. The Millenium Dome - need I say more?
Spare a passing thought for our fantastic heritage in the fine art of shipbuilding. Mourn briefly as you consider how it's been so underfunded for so long that even our own
shipping companies are now owned by the Americans, ordering their ships from Germany. Speaking of manufacturing, you ought to spend a few moments pondering how we managed to so efficiently sell off our motoring heritage too. The few remnants that are left (Ford in Dagenham, and Vauxhall in Luton) are currently being seen off by the government, so don't worry too much about that discrepancy.
At the end of the day though, you can settle back into your leather sofa (if the company you bought it from didn't go bust for the third time and run off with your money), and watch a little television. You can enjoy the delights of paying the government a tax for decoding radio waves, and then watch an evening's entertainment filled with political debate, guns, murder, death and violence. After the news though, you can watch political debate, guns, murder, death and violence. Or you could pop on a CD or DVD that cost you 50% more than it would anywhere else in the world, because you have the priveledge of living on Treasure Island. If you get bored, you might spend a little time surfing the 'net for entertainment. Our phone rates are very reasonable and your quarterly phone bill will only be about twice as much as most other countries in Europe. Your 'free' internet connection will not cost much either, only an extra £15 a month.
<B> Yes, come to New Britain. </B>
31 August 2001, 06:33 PM
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So it's Friday evening and you can't wait for the weekend. Maybe having relaxed for 2 days someone reading this can think of something positive to say in defence of New Britain - or if not what can we do to stop the apparent decline?
31 August 2001, 06:50 PM
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Hmmm.... very bitter indeed.
BTW, when you ever get yer head out of yer *** (smiley thingy), you *DO* know that you pay a lot less taxes overall than most of the other European countries, don't you.
Just to keep things levelled ...
Theo
BTW, when you ever get yer head out of yer *** (smiley thingy), you *DO* know that you pay a lot less taxes overall than most of the other European countries, don't you.
Just to keep things levelled ...
Theo
31 August 2001, 06:57 PM
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I know this is a troll post, but I still get wound up 
old but gold ... lots of things going for the UK ... great roads, incredible sense of humor, roundabouts (
), fantastic scenery, car nutter country ...
To stop it all from going further down ? Hmmm, stay honest (more or less) and don't become bitter/right wing/ooh these illegal immigrants.
This from a country that used to rule the world (and was odly enough an immigrant in many parts of the world ... )
Stop this immigrant ****. It's old, dodgy, and I personally take offense. Moderator or not.
Theo
old but gold ... lots of things going for the UK ... great roads, incredible sense of humor, roundabouts (
), fantastic scenery, car nutter country ...To stop it all from going further down ? Hmmm, stay honest (more or less) and don't become bitter/right wing/ooh these illegal immigrants.
This from a country that used to rule the world (and was odly enough an immigrant in many parts of the world ... )
Stop this immigrant ****. It's old, dodgy, and I personally take offense. Moderator or not.
Theo
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31 August 2001, 07:05 PM
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The only thing that makes me sad about this country is the fact that people don't realise what a beautiful place we have, and we are letting the government **** all over it AND us.
Remember this in 30 years time when your kids asked what it was like to live in the UK when it still had some hope left.
Remember this in 30 years time when your kids asked what it was like to live in the UK when it still had some hope left.
31 August 2001, 07:25 PM
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<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:<HR>Originally posted by GaryC:
Come to Britain where our railways are the oldest in Europe, and the drivers regularly pass red signals. [/B]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
You have obviously not travelled much
Did you know there is a town in Italy where driving standards are so bad that people stop at green lights, and regularly drive straight through when red? This isn't some silly Italian government decision to reverse the order of the lights btw. What happened is that lots of people would run red lights due to general contempt for the law - this meant people became more careful going on green. Unfortunately this encouraged the red light runners to become ever more bold, to the extent that you could no longer safely drive through on a green light. Normal drivers eventually cottoned on to this, and in the absence of police enforcement, they gradually got slower and slower going through junctions on green lights, for fear of mad red-light runners. It ended up so bad that when the lights were green, no one wanted to go through because they knew everyone would be running the red lights - and when the red light came on, they knew that no one in the other lane crossing the junction would be brave enough to go through green for fear of red light running maniacs...so normal people ended up going through red too (it was much safer). The net result was that now in that town everyone goes on red, and stops on green. This became a bit legendary in Italy, and the government tried to clamp down, but this raised a huge storm of local protest. Anyway, the custom still persist - I think the place is called Cantabria? (sp might be wrong)
P.S. The rest of your post would be funny - except other countries are FAR WORSE. Fancy spending a night in jail for not being able to produce a passport on demand from a local plod? Go to Germany where that happened to a mate of mine. Fancy 5 years inside for not trying to rescue someone from a gory car crash? Go to France. Fancy a head on collision at a 120mph closing speed coz some ***** in a Fiat decides to cut a sharp corner on a mountain road? Move to Italy. Fancy some local lothario bonking your 12 year old daugher perfectly legally? Move to Spain.
Britain is not that bad.
P.P.S. agree totally with Theo re immigrants. It's bad BRITISH policy that is to blame for attracting scroungers, not genuine immigrants. There are quite a few guys who are highly qualified professionals abroad, then some pr*ck like Mugabe throws their country into civil war or chaos and they think "hmm I don't want to be shot for voting, where should I go? Britain has a reputation for fair play, and I speak English ok, and we're part of the Commonwealth, so maybe I should try there." So they come here, then get shoved into prison by someone far more stupid than themselves while their application is processed. When they get let out some think **** with no job or qualifications who scrounges off the dole and breaks the law each day goes round to beat the crap out of someone (with 10 mates to back him up of course) just because the poor sod is foreign. Then the local paper moans about scroungers (hello, I haven't heard them moaning about the 5% unemployed people in this country?) and tries to excuse plain racist violence. Sorry but I'd rather have a Doctor from Zimbabwe or Nigeria here than some small-minded provincial fcukwit who thinks he's a real true Brit bigshot just cause he spouts drivel in the local car/property advertiser ^H^H^H I mean local paper.
[This message has been edited by matt d (edited 31 August 2001).]
Come to Britain where our railways are the oldest in Europe, and the drivers regularly pass red signals. [/B]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
You have obviously not travelled much
Did you know there is a town in Italy where driving standards are so bad that people stop at green lights, and regularly drive straight through when red? This isn't some silly Italian government decision to reverse the order of the lights btw. What happened is that lots of people would run red lights due to general contempt for the law - this meant people became more careful going on green. Unfortunately this encouraged the red light runners to become ever more bold, to the extent that you could no longer safely drive through on a green light. Normal drivers eventually cottoned on to this, and in the absence of police enforcement, they gradually got slower and slower going through junctions on green lights, for fear of mad red-light runners. It ended up so bad that when the lights were green, no one wanted to go through because they knew everyone would be running the red lights - and when the red light came on, they knew that no one in the other lane crossing the junction would be brave enough to go through green for fear of red light running maniacs...so normal people ended up going through red too (it was much safer). The net result was that now in that town everyone goes on red, and stops on green. This became a bit legendary in Italy, and the government tried to clamp down, but this raised a huge storm of local protest. Anyway, the custom still persist - I think the place is called Cantabria? (sp might be wrong)P.S. The rest of your post would be funny - except other countries are FAR WORSE. Fancy spending a night in jail for not being able to produce a passport on demand from a local plod? Go to Germany where that happened to a mate of mine. Fancy 5 years inside for not trying to rescue someone from a gory car crash? Go to France. Fancy a head on collision at a 120mph closing speed coz some ***** in a Fiat decides to cut a sharp corner on a mountain road? Move to Italy. Fancy some local lothario bonking your 12 year old daugher perfectly legally? Move to Spain.
Britain is not that bad.
P.P.S. agree totally with Theo re immigrants. It's bad BRITISH policy that is to blame for attracting scroungers, not genuine immigrants. There are quite a few guys who are highly qualified professionals abroad, then some pr*ck like Mugabe throws their country into civil war or chaos and they think "hmm I don't want to be shot for voting, where should I go? Britain has a reputation for fair play, and I speak English ok, and we're part of the Commonwealth, so maybe I should try there." So they come here, then get shoved into prison by someone far more stupid than themselves while their application is processed. When they get let out some think **** with no job or qualifications who scrounges off the dole and breaks the law each day goes round to beat the crap out of someone (with 10 mates to back him up of course) just because the poor sod is foreign. Then the local paper moans about scroungers (hello, I haven't heard them moaning about the 5% unemployed people in this country?) and tries to excuse plain racist violence. Sorry but I'd rather have a Doctor from Zimbabwe or Nigeria here than some small-minded provincial fcukwit who thinks he's a real true Brit bigshot just cause he spouts drivel in the local car/property advertiser ^H^H^H I mean local paper.
[This message has been edited by matt d (edited 31 August 2001).]
31 August 2001, 07:33 PM
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KF,
Fair question ...
Quote: <B> Alternatively you could enjoy our national dish of Indian curry or catch food poisoning from one of our many unlicensed, illegal-immigrant fast-food street vendors in London. </B> Unquote ...
If this is not the type of right wing crap I've been hearing for 10 years now ?
What the hell does this mean ? You never get a food poisoning from fish & chips ? It's those damn illegal Indians that cause all the health problems ?
Am I thick, or is there a very very low kind of message behind that quote ?
Let me not hold you in suspense ... I think the latter.
Repulsive.
Theo
Fair question ...
Quote: <B> Alternatively you could enjoy our national dish of Indian curry or catch food poisoning from one of our many unlicensed, illegal-immigrant fast-food street vendors in London. </B> Unquote ...
If this is not the type of right wing crap I've been hearing for 10 years now ?
What the hell does this mean ? You never get a food poisoning from fish & chips ? It's those damn illegal Indians that cause all the health problems ?
Am I thick, or is there a very very low kind of message behind that quote ?
Let me not hold you in suspense ... I think the latter.
Repulsive.
Theo
31 August 2001, 07:53 PM
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Matt, lol, you obviously have been in Italy
I didn't know about Cantabria, but when I was in Rome (with a 70 year old Roman lawyer
as a co-driver) he told me not to take off immediately when the lights turned green ... coz "lights turning red" is a very broad concept in Rome
Mind you, there is a certain logic to the chaos over there though
Theo [not kidding, this really happened]
I didn't know about Cantabria, but when I was in Rome (with a 70 year old Roman lawyer
as a co-driver) he told me not to take off immediately when the lights turned green ... coz "lights turning red" is a very broad concept in Rome Mind you, there is a certain logic to the chaos over there though
Theo [not kidding, this really happened]
31 August 2001, 08:07 PM
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evil bevel
i think gary was being ironic when saying the british national dish is curry.
wouldnt you think it ludicrous if the italians claimed their national dish was kebab?
say what you like, i for one are sick of freeloaders overloading this country, whether they be white black pink or brown. thats not racism, its just the truth.
but i am even more sick of this tw@tty little government who obviously aint up to the job
and before anyone tries to flame me, at least i'm being honest. i have no problem with anyone of an 'ethnic origin', theres good and bad in everyone. oh, and my favourite food is curry
i just dont like unwelcome guests sticking knives at people demanding money, when they shouldnt be here.
just to reiterate, in defence of gary i didnt read one word that struck me as being racist, just someone being honest in stating how fed up he is with it, and theres many more who feel the same way, but are too scared to voice their opinions because of right on thought police.
garys post may not be politically correct, just correct
**** it, flame me if yer like, what do i care
i think gary was being ironic when saying the british national dish is curry
.wouldnt you think it ludicrous if the italians claimed their national dish was kebab?
say what you like, i for one are sick of freeloaders overloading this country, whether they be white black pink or brown. thats not racism, its just the truth.
but i am even more sick of this tw@tty little government who obviously aint up to the job
and before anyone tries to flame me, at least i'm being honest. i have no problem with anyone of an 'ethnic origin', theres good and bad in everyone. oh, and my favourite food is curry
i just dont like unwelcome guests sticking knives at people demanding money, when they shouldnt be here.
just to reiterate, in defence of gary i didnt read one word that struck me as being racist, just someone being honest in stating how fed up he is with it, and theres many more who feel the same way, but are too scared to voice their opinions because of right on thought police.
garys post may not be politically correct, just correct
**** it, flame me if yer like, what do i care
31 August 2001, 08:24 PM
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The same Government were to be seen on all TV channels proudly announcing a £100 million rescue package for the Miners.
They forgot to mention the £2000 Million, yes £2 billion they have taken from the Miners pension scheme since they came to power.
The only reason the UK coal industry is in need of help is because the Government allows heavily subsidised coal to be imported into the UK. Market forces? Level playing field? I think not.
Lee
They forgot to mention the £2000 Million, yes £2 billion they have taken from the Miners pension scheme since they came to power.
The only reason the UK coal industry is in need of help is because the Government allows heavily subsidised coal to be imported into the UK. Market forces? Level playing field? I think not.
Lee
31 August 2001, 09:56 PM
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>>i just dont like unwelcome guests sticking knives at people demanding money, when they shouldnt be here.
Hmmm... carry on, you don't need me to reveil racist crap.
Of course, we all prefer to be knived by someone of our own origin ...
Theo
Edited because of poor furrin spellin.
[This message has been edited by EvilBevel (edited 31 August 2001).]
Hmmm... carry on, you don't need me to reveil racist crap.
Of course, we all prefer to be knived by someone of our own origin ...
Theo
Edited because of poor furrin spellin.
[This message has been edited by EvilBevel (edited 31 August 2001).]
31 August 2001, 10:35 PM
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<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:<HR>Originally posted by matt d:
<B>The net result was that now in that town everyone goes on red, and stops on green. [/quote]
This is VERY easily sorted. Just drive a large truck, or tank, or vehicle with big spikes on the side, through on green, and let the morons take their chance. Italy has got different problems, but they can be fixed by brute force, unlike the (totally screwed) UK
mb
<B>The net result was that now in that town everyone goes on red, and stops on green. [/quote]
This is VERY easily sorted. Just drive a large truck, or tank, or vehicle with big spikes on the side, through on green, and let the morons take their chance. Italy has got different problems, but they can be fixed by brute force, unlike the (totally screwed) UK
mb
31 August 2001, 11:45 PM
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Theo,
Obviously you feel persecuted and defensive, otherwise you wouldn't perceive what has been written as insulting, and then responded in kind.
I think that you are being a little oversensitive - let's not get into a position where we are falling out over things we conject that others are saying.
Cheers,
KF.
EDITED for clarity
[This message has been edited by KF (edited 31 August 2001).]
Obviously you feel persecuted and defensive, otherwise you wouldn't perceive what has been written as insulting, and then responded in kind.
I think that you are being a little oversensitive - let's not get into a position where we are falling out over things we conject that others are saying.
Cheers,
KF.
EDITED for clarity
[This message has been edited by KF (edited 31 August 2001).]
01 September 2001, 07:26 AM
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EVIL
huttond has just phrased my argument very well.
now you think im a dimwit and a racist.
yet you dont know me. you dont know what colour i am, what religion, my circumstances etc etc. and thats the beauty of a bbs, you dont need to.its irrelevant. on this bbs, by and large we're all equal, with a right to express an opinion so long as its fair and square, whether you agree with it or not.
answer me this. do YOU think that the current situation concerning asylum seekers/economic migrants/spongers (delete as applicable) is a good thing???
do you think it helps existing race relations in the uk?
do you think that british citizens,whatever their colour, have a RIGHT to have an effective govt. sort this problem?
is it any coincidence that this problem appears to be getting worse under labour?
now, THAT is the feckin point of this thread. at what point did i say send every non white back home?? as i said earlier, you dont even know what colour i am, and its unimportant.
i think you should get off your high horse, and stop your witch hunt. do a poll evil, ask the bbs if they think this is a good idea? "asylum seekers..is it a good thing?"
see what response you get
its a shame people insult you without even knowing you.
huttond has just phrased my argument very well.
now you think im a dimwit and a racist.
yet you dont know me. you dont know what colour i am, what religion, my circumstances etc etc. and thats the beauty of a bbs, you dont need to.its irrelevant. on this bbs, by and large we're all equal, with a right to express an opinion so long as its fair and square, whether you agree with it or not.
answer me this. do YOU think that the current situation concerning asylum seekers/economic migrants/spongers (delete as applicable) is a good thing???
do you think it helps existing race relations in the uk?
do you think that british citizens,whatever their colour, have a RIGHT to have an effective govt. sort this problem?
is it any coincidence that this problem appears to be getting worse under labour?
now, THAT is the feckin point of this thread. at what point did i say send every non white back home?? as i said earlier, you dont even know what colour i am, and its unimportant.
i think you should get off your high horse, and stop your witch hunt. do a poll evil, ask the bbs if they think this is a good idea? "asylum seekers..is it a good thing?"
see what response you get
its a shame people insult you without even knowing you.
01 September 2001, 07:55 AM
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KF, I certainly don't feel persecuted (why should I ?). And not really defensive either, make that offensive.
Ah, spudgun, I see you can be ar5ed after all now ?
As for your questions:
>>do YOU think that the current situation concerning asylum seekers/economic migrants/spongers (delete as applicable) is a good thing???
I don't have an opinion about it really, but I think it's pretty irrelevant... whatever you feel about immigration, it is certainly *not* the cause for the general feeling of going downward. Lack of moral is. People damaging and stealing cars is. Hijacking is, etc etc... And the general feeling that the law is not protecting people from that. Tell me: do you think all these crimes are only done by immigrants (illegal or not) ? Most of them ? Some of them ?
>>do you think it helps existing race relations in the uk?
Probably not, as you don't have to be white to be racist.
>>do you think that british citizens,whatever their colour, have a RIGHT to have an effective govt. sort this problem?
I agree that it needs the attention it deserves.
>>is it any coincidence that this problem appears to be getting worse under labour?
Sure. Blame labour Nothing to do with Berlin wall crumbling, wars in Africa, Europe deleting inner borders, USSR imploding ... LOL. Nah, must be that Blair dude.
Living on an island eh ?
>>i think you should get off your high horse, and stop your witch hunt.
Um. Witch hunt ? FFS, I am one user of this bbs hardly capable of doing witch hunting. However, it is my privilige to spot racist crap & scapegoat theories when I see them, and comment on them. OK ?
Living near a city where 33 % of the population voted for a fascist party last elections, feeding on exactly the same sentiments as in the original post, makes me a bit more sensitive about it all, yes.
And we are talking Antwerp here, not some unknown city in some far away country.
Theo
Ah, spudgun, I see you can be ar5ed after all now ?
As for your questions:
>>do YOU think that the current situation concerning asylum seekers/economic migrants/spongers (delete as applicable) is a good thing???
I don't have an opinion about it really, but I think it's pretty irrelevant... whatever you feel about immigration, it is certainly *not* the cause for the general feeling of going downward. Lack of moral is. People damaging and stealing cars is. Hijacking is, etc etc... And the general feeling that the law is not protecting people from that. Tell me: do you think all these crimes are only done by immigrants (illegal or not) ? Most of them ? Some of them ?
>>do you think it helps existing race relations in the uk?
Probably not, as you don't have to be white to be racist.
>>do you think that british citizens,whatever their colour, have a RIGHT to have an effective govt. sort this problem?
I agree that it needs the attention it deserves.
>>is it any coincidence that this problem appears to be getting worse under labour?
Sure. Blame labour
Nothing to do with Berlin wall crumbling, wars in Africa, Europe deleting inner borders, USSR imploding ... LOL. Nah, must be that Blair dude.Living on an island eh ?
>>i think you should get off your high horse, and stop your witch hunt.
Um. Witch hunt ? FFS, I am one user of this bbs hardly capable of doing witch hunting. However, it is my privilige to spot racist crap & scapegoat theories when I see them, and comment on them. OK ?
Living near a city where 33 % of the population voted for a fascist party last elections, feeding on exactly the same sentiments as in the original post, makes me a bit more sensitive about it all, yes.
And we are talking Antwerp here, not some unknown city in some far away country.
Theo
01 September 2001, 12:23 PM
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Garyc - it may be Friday (actually it's Saturday when I write this but hey ho....) but you speak the truth. And Spudgun, I'm with your interpretation of the missive...!
The trouble with our 'liberal elite' is that they accuse people of racism who jusy happen to disagree with them!
Why do those *asylum seekers* risk life and limb to get to the UK? 'Cos we're a soft bloody touch that's why. They're already in France - why don't they stay there? Possibly because they won't get the same *treatment*, just possible...??
As for trains - sorry, but I don't see what the problem is with stopping at red lights? Transmitter in the light that goes off at red. Receiver in train (all trains) that picks this up ad brakes the train.... have I missed soemthing? Why would this cost billions?? Hmmm..
Yep - welcome to the Britain that President Blur is trying to 'socially egineer' with his *colleagues* in the EU....
Cyical? Moi..?? Nah
Dave
01 September 2001, 02:19 PM
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As I have said before, arguing on the internet is a bit like competing in the special olympics. Whether you win or lose you are still retarded.
Care for some facts?
My friend is in the force, he said, of his own volition, that of everyone pulled in for street crime, the *majority* are illegals.
For the record, it pi$$es him off too....
astraboy.
Care for some facts?
My friend is in the force, he said, of his own volition, that of everyone pulled in for street crime, the *majority* are illegals.
For the record, it pi$$es him off too....
astraboy.
01 September 2001, 04:19 PM
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<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:<HR>I certainly don't feel persecuted (why should I ?). And not really defensive either...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
Good. Can you tell me why you're being so hypocritical then?
KF.
EDIT: quote problems
[This message has been edited by KF (edited 01 September 2001).]
Good. Can you tell me why you're being so hypocritical then?
KF.
EDIT: quote problems
[This message has been edited by KF (edited 01 September 2001).]
01 September 2001, 07:12 PM
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>>Good. Can you tell me why you're being so hypocritical then?
Excuse me ?
What's hypocritical about getting angry with the UK variant of redneck stuff ? I've heard all that dumb **** before, and I still get mad at it. I hate biggots with a passion. So much I even get out of shape on Scoobynet, whilst I should know better.
Care to tell me why the **** that is hypocritical about that ?
Astraboy, yeah, your mate, ultimate proof then eh
If you would however care to look at some real police records, you would find that immigrants do no more or no less crimes per head than UK citizens ...
I'm not saying there is no problem ... au contraire. I'm saying that it's easy to project all the problems in the UK (or any other country, but I guess they don't count) on immigrants, illegal or not.
Stop thinking in slogans, and smell the coffee.
Theo [hypocrit ]
Excuse me ?
What's hypocritical about getting angry with the UK variant of redneck stuff ? I've heard all that dumb **** before, and I still get mad at it. I hate biggots with a passion. So much I even get out of shape on Scoobynet, whilst I should know better.
Care to tell me why the **** that is hypocritical about that ?
Astraboy, yeah, your mate, ultimate proof then eh
If you would however care to look at some real police records, you would find that immigrants do no more or no less crimes per head than UK citizens ...
I'm not saying there is no problem ... au contraire. I'm saying that it's easy to project all the problems in the UK (or any other country, but I guess they don't count) on immigrants, illegal or not.
Stop thinking in slogans, and smell the coffee.
Theo [hypocrit
]
01 September 2001, 08:44 PM
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evil bevel
no one was saying that all the problems in this country are due to asylum seekers. it was just one of the points raised in gary c's post.
i stand by what ive said, and at least i believe in what i think. and at no point have i resorted to insulting you.
as far as i see it, youve decided to take it upon yourself to be the offended party in this, like some new labour spin doctor squealing foul, when something doesnt go your way.
shame really, i had no gripe against you, none at all.
i see no point in getting involved in replying to you, as no doubt all i'll incur is further rude remarks from yourself, and this is not what this bbs is for. personally i think you look a little foolish on this one
oh, and by the way, congratulations to sven, good on yer england...oops, does that make me racist
best wishes
spudgun the hillbilly dimwit racist
p.s
after recent events, are the whole of australia racist?
every single person? no? but they voted for that government. what is a person to make of that?
are they racist, or prudent?
[This message has been edited by spudgun (edited 01 September 2001).]
no one was saying that all the problems in this country are due to asylum seekers. it was just one of the points raised in gary c's post.
i stand by what ive said, and at least i believe in what i think. and at no point have i resorted to insulting you.
as far as i see it, youve decided to take it upon yourself to be the offended party in this, like some new labour spin doctor squealing foul, when something doesnt go your way.
shame really, i had no gripe against you, none at all.
i see no point in getting involved in replying to you, as no doubt all i'll incur is further rude remarks from yourself, and this is not what this bbs is for. personally i think you look a little foolish on this one
oh, and by the way, congratulations to sven, good on yer england...oops, does that make me racist
best wishes
spudgun the hillbilly dimwit racist
p.s
after recent events, are the whole of australia racist?
every single person? no? but they voted for that government. what is a person to make of that?
are they racist, or prudent?
[This message has been edited by spudgun (edited 01 September 2001).]
01 September 2001, 09:21 PM
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>>and at no point have i resorted to insulting you.
Yes you did (try) by saying you couldn't be ar5ed to respond. Very rude IMHO. Just don't say anything then ?
>>like some new labour spin doctor squealing foul, when something doesnt go your way.
Um, spud, dude, dear, hon ... I probably feel more contempt for Mr. Blair than you do. I hate the spin doctoring, the marketing BS ... you use the word "new" for washing powder, not politics. So please stop trying to put me into a camp I have no sympathy for.
>>i see no point in getting involved in replying to you
Which is pretty strange, as you are doing it nonetheless ...
>>as no doubt all i'll incur is further rude remarks from yourself
I responded in kind, no more, no less.
>>and this is not what this bbs is for.
But it is for the first post ? Hmmm, double standard, no ?
>>personally i think you look a little foolish on this one
I often look foolish. Doesn't bother me to be honest. Foolish yes, hypocrite no.
Theo
Yes you did (try) by saying you couldn't be ar5ed to respond. Very rude IMHO. Just don't say anything then ?
>>like some new labour spin doctor squealing foul, when something doesnt go your way.
Um, spud, dude, dear, hon ... I probably feel more contempt for Mr. Blair than you do. I hate the spin doctoring, the marketing BS ... you use the word "new" for washing powder, not politics. So please stop trying to put me into a camp I have no sympathy for.
>>i see no point in getting involved in replying to you
Which is pretty strange, as you are doing it nonetheless ...
>>as no doubt all i'll incur is further rude remarks from yourself
I responded in kind, no more, no less.
>>and this is not what this bbs is for.
But it is for the first post ?
Hmmm, double standard, no ?>>personally i think you look a little foolish on this one
I often look foolish. Doesn't bother me to be honest. Foolish yes, hypocrite no.
Theo
