I need to gain 4kg of weight overnight! How can I do so?
 

I need to somehow get my weight up by 4kg by 11:00 Saturday.

Are there any ways to do this?

Would a big breakfast and lots of water help? Wearing a couple of extra layers of clothes? A pocket full of small change?

I've gotta ask what everyone is thinking!

WHY?

4 litres of water= 4kg also eat lots of salty foods to help retain the water. Failing that stick some lead weights in yer boots

4 kg is 4 litres of water but that much in a oner could be dangerous.
Steel toe capped boots?
Money belt filled with change?

a couple of bags of sugar will do it ;)

BBC NEWS | Magazine | Why is too much water dangerous?

"Drinking too much water can eventually cause your brain to swell, stopping it regulating vital functions such as breathing, and causing death."

"Drinking several litres over a relatively short period of time could be enough to cause water intoxication."

Sooooooooooooo............. maybe not the water thing then...

I don't have that much of a sweet tooth, plus they'd notice if I was holding it

I have a minimum weight that I must meet before I can proceed with my plan.

kebab, chips, lots of liquid before weighing and a full bladder. You should be able to hold the best part of 1 litre in urine, so your most of the way there. Add a little constipation and you should make the mark. Only issue with my plan is that anyone who says you are "full of s***" will be right ;) :D

What plan?:wonder:

Move in with me put that on easy lmao and buy some weight gain its on offer also from health shop at the min, plus do loads of heavy weights it bulks ya up short term ..

you and james gonna try weigh the cinquecento down in the corners to stop body roll:p

I shall try and cram as much in for breakfast as I can. I'm not bothered if people think I'm full of ****, I post in NSR anyway! :D

I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.

We've weighed it down with scaffolding and an Astra gearbox is about to go in the boot. Local scrap merchant is paying £300 a ton :p

Strap a set of angle weights on :)

Its that new bird you're chatting up isn't it, she's a feeder! Other than that, are you trying to take over the world?

Ha ha lol at the ad below on weight loss!!

Shh! I'm taking over the world with Carter ;)

It's nothing to do with the new young lady. She's skinny as fook anyway :p I probably weigh twice as much as her.

If I wear my heaviest jeans, 3 pairs of boxers, 3 pairs of socks, 2 tshirts and a sweatshirt, plus my heaviest shoes I can add an extra 1.5kg to my weight, plus the weight of as much water as I can get down my neck.

I wonder how much my mobile and car keys wil add...?

Are you trying to become so fat you will be classed as obese:Suspiciou it will only end up with your butt stuck in a nuclear reactor.

Anapolon Anabolic Steroid - Anapolon 50 Side Effects - Oxymetholone

probably wont be able to get hold of it and experience any effects before tomorrow though :D

That's the closest guess ;) But it's only has to last for an hour and a half. :)

Just get a couple of 2kg weight-training discs and wear something (jacket) that can hide them - or tie them together with a piece of string and put them over your neck so they dangle by your sides and cover with large sweatshirt and / or jacket.
You should fool the doctor ok.

Won't they ask you to strip to your pants?

Nope

Weirdo

Thanks :thumb:

I'll second the suggestion of some ankle/leg/arm weights, a 10lb or higher leg weight might be what you're after.

Steel toecapped boots might also add a bit of weight too.

This one would require a little more prep, so it's probably off the menu, but a Papier-mâché belly cast, obviously larger than your current stomach, filled with water, or maybe a heavier solid substance could well add a bit of weight.

One of those fake bellies that you are supposed to fill with beer to sneak into sporting events/nightclubs! :thumb: Top idea!

Who issued the infraction? :confused: :rolleyes:

what the foof are you up to now??:lol1:

This plan of yours.. is it a cunning one??:Suspiciou

and does it involve your quest for Alton Tower tickets?:Suspiciou

Are entering slimmer of the year, by gaining weight as a ploy then losing it extra quick in an attempt to get a cardboard cut out of yourself?:Suspiciou

It's as cunning as a cunning linguist or alternatively as cunning as weasel covered in belly button fluff :D

Slimmer of the year? And give up drinking?!?!?!?! :eek: :eek: :eek:

Nothing to do with Alton Towers, more to do with the shopping list;)

Have you won your weight in something?

Trying to fool the weigh-bridge at the scrappy ?

LOL

DunxC