Women are never happy, you can't win.
 

Each year when i go to book our holidays the other half says i have no imagination, she basically says we go to the same places all the time, places which she loves i might add. This year she said can't you surprise me for once, lets go somewhere that's different, somewhere that not everyone else chooses to go too and won't be full of tourists and won't be over crowded.

I said ok, leave it with me. Anyway we was having a meal the other night and she said had i thought of anywhere yet, i said now you come to mention it i have. She said "where then" ? I said North Korea, it's full of history, it won't be full of tourists like she wanted and it's somewhere different like she wanted.

Feck me she went ballistic, you can't win with em.

:lol1::lol1::lol1:

That made my day you funny guy :thumb:

Take her to Syria, hopefully she'll get shot, the miserable bitch :lol1: ;)

Females can be proper screwy......and that's being polite!

The cranks. :cuckoo:

She will have no trouble getting in.They like that sort of thing!!!

:lol: That woooorks.

Could try a naturist break, not many people, somewhere different (i assume?) and she wont need to buy a new wardrobe of clothes :)

Is she called Kim by any chance?

:lol1:

Ri, more like. (Kim Jong-un's wife).

Don't know why girls think blindingly white teeth and an orange hue is attractive. Never mentioned it to any of them though!

...Nor would I say that their duck face pout looks like a cat's arsehole! :lol1:

Good observation :lol1:


https://cimg4.ibsrv.net/gimg/www.sco...7585db0123.jpg

Duck faces look like they have Botox'd lips........on top of their already Botox'd lips! ;)

You boys need to ditch your ladies and go back to w@nking - each other :lol1:

Errr.why?.lol

You men need to ditch your bitches and go back to w@nking much more satisfying :D

:lol1:

A friend of mine says he's been getting on great with his wife this past week. Not one single argument.
He had no idea she was giving him the "silent treatment".

Why have women got two sets of lips...........
So they can piss and moan at the same time

Why is a woman like a washing machine..........


Because they both leak when they are ****ed

I have had 10 very happy years with my wife but it`s just a pity that we have been married 40 years.

Mmm.... 10years beginning or near the end :) :wonder:

That will be when he's asleep :lol1:

Because sleep is the only thing that you get in the bedroom once you've married ;)

My wife is so lazy.
I can never get to pee in the sink nowadays, because its always full of dirty dishes.

I know a man who does cheap viagra ;) :lol1:

:lol1: cheap viagra, keeps you up all night for the wrong reasons. :lol1:

Making love with the wife is a bit of a lottery, you have to be in IT to win it. Unfortunately, like the euro millions the odds are stacked against me :)

You'd better get her out there pretty quick 'cos I've just heard some guy from the USA is planning to flatten the place.

What a loser :mad:

lol