She'll soon lose interest if he slaps her again, old dog, new tricks etc.

Perhaps remind her of those occasions, time has a habit of dulling painful memories and enhancing good ones. I get nostalgic about stuff I wasnt all that bothered about at the time.

More proof women are mental. Maybe try showing a bit of arrogance and step out of your comfort zone. Maybe change the way you dress a bit, talk to her a bit differently (not as nice)... just something that will make her sit up and take notice. She probably sees you as a comfy pair of old slippers she slips on after a hard days work. Her ex will remind her of being young and carefree... he's a pair of prada she puts on for a big night out and a great lay at the end of the night! You need to remind her that you;re that guy not the dope head.

From a womans point of view id say the kisses mean something. But then she is expecting your child soon so her hormones will be confuing her ;) I wouldnt worry about it yet as it sounds like the ex will mess things up soon once the novelty wears off with his son.

You could try writing your thoughts and feelings down in a letter as women like that sort of stuff and just explain that it is hard for you as you have brought your son up as your own for all these years etc...she will appreciate it trust me ;)

Thats one thing I would be worried about, I over looked it in the first post. Shes pregnant and if she does start to see this guy in the way your worried about I'd be concerned for the unborn if he has a habit of slapping her around :eek:

I actually dont think i could talk to him for more than 2 minutes. He is so boring and has nothing to say, very hard to talk to.
Your right I will try and be normal and fair but I think I might bring it up and discuss it with her.

At the end of the day if thats what she wants then i can't stop her, she's gonna do it anyway. But i think i will avoid the sex part because you never know what he is carrying and may have passed on (if something has gone on) and i don't fancy that.
Maybe i should shag her mum :freak3:

Oh yeah what a helmet :freak3:

Yeah they actually do. When she drops the eldest over to his house and when he rings to speak to the eldest she disappears off on the phone, but says well I can't hear with the others running about

This does not sound good.......... :(

Thats the other thing that is niggling me now. What if the baby isn't mine. I actually hadn't thought of it till now. What a mug. I getting more confused and fed up with the whole thing now.

Common theme in all these anonymous problem relationship threads are that the males come across as absolute wimps. The balance of power should never be with the female!

Making sure your she has condoms in her handbag is your best bet if you don't want to be saddled with bringing up another one of his.

Failing that, act like a man and she'll do no more than allow him access to 'their' child and not her gusset.

Do you see now why I can't be bothered now ??? Its like she has been playing me all along and i am now only aware because of the text.

That sounds clever, sounds like a passport to go and shag other people to me.

:norty: Maybe thats what I'll do. Go and buy a big box of condoms and one evening give them to her in front of her dad, and say I thought I would get you these just in case. I want to look out for your best interests and would hate you to catch something. I should get the ex a box as well and do the same.

Good idea ??????

Well that would certainly stoke things a little :D

Depends if you want you and her to work in the long run, you could just be very paranoid at the minute and humilihating her in front of her father will not go down very well.

Worst thing in the world is reading txts your partner has sent to some F*CKING loser.

Sorry, still a little sore :)

You got 2 choices. Kick off and have a big row which will make things worse and irrespective of the guy being a drunken wife beater, she will see him with those stupid rose-coloured glasses most women see their ex-partners (the worse the ex, the more they want them IMO)

OR, bide your time and if you want to check up on her, check her phone for txts - or more to the point the lack of them. If she is up to something she will delete them as soon as she gets them (mine did and that was the biggest clue as to what was going on)

The fact that she left them on there is either she didn't think to remove them incase you checked or she didn't think they were a problem and nothing dodgy is going on.

All I can say is be careful, you think you want the truth but when you get it (and its not good news) its bloody horrible!!!

If you'd have posted that in the first place, we wouldn't have needed all the intervening conversation. She's shagging him. So it's up to you if you think it's worth saving.

To be honest couldn't give 2 hoots at the minute. She is a bloody good shag though :norty:
I could be paranoid but somehow I don't think so. Just recently she wouldn't think twice about humiliating me in front of FRIENDS / FAMILY . She always has good things to say about him though and others.

I keep thinking if the roles were reversed she would have come down on me like a tonne of bricks and probably be out the door by now.

If somebody is going to stray, no, when somebody is going to stray, they'll do it because they want to. :thumb:

Cheers TelBoy. How do you know ? Its not you is it :Suspiciou

Been there seen it done it. :) It, not her...

You don't seem very bothered that your missus is fcuking a crack head and carrying his second son at the expense of your back breaking toils. :freak3:

Time to grow a backbone sunshine. Time to get nasty. :thumb:

:D

What do you advise

You're giving off a lot of conflicting messages m8.

First of all decide what you want. Then go from there.

I have already told you what I advise.

You had to go and get married, to a woman with 'baggage' and then to compound the error you had to breed with her. You've got yourself in a right old pickle.

She and crack head could end up with everything you've worked your whole life for. I think that's what they in homicide call 'motive'. :thumb:

Thats the problem I don't know what i want.
First I think can't be assed, then i think again and think maybe I am paranoid. Who knows.

Lets change the post and everyone post either

keep
or
rid
or
Homicide

Hire a private investigator to check up on her, at least you will know one way or another.

So if she isn't do you still want to be with her ??

And throw away my hard earned cash ????
throwing it away at the moment if my suspicions are correct.
Maybe i'll become a PI

Yeah but she would have to prove she hasn't bloody well. And I don't think she could do that.