Worst time of my life
11 October 2007, 04:54 PM
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Worst time of my life
Have only just decided to write this thread as it's been a hard time for me recently.
A few weeks ago my father died unexpectedly. He'd been ill with Prostrate Cancer for 5 years, but was battling it well. The day before he had driven home after spending four days with me, something he did 3-4 times a year as we live 300 miles apart. It wasn't the Cancer that got him but an Infracted Bowl - don't know too much about it at the moment as we're still waiting for the full details to be released. At least it was quick, he was ill from 9pm and died the following morning. The doctor who was called during the night thought the severe stomach pain was food poisioning. At least he didn't suffer the wrath of Cancer though - small blessings.
My wife and I went for a walk 3 days after he died. We took my 'race' car as my dad would have put it; my Cosworth powered Opel Manta (4 x 4 300BHP). We parked at a local beauty spot and went for a walk. When we returned my car had gone. I spoke to an elderly couple there and then dialed 999. The poilce were the most unhelpfull, incompetent bunch of ******* I've ever had the displeasure of speaking to. They wouldn't take the call once they realised it was for a stollen car. Instead I had to make my way 5 miles to the police station to report it.
With my father dying, it put the car into perspective. It is so insignificant by comparission that I don't even care about it (even though I'd put over £30k into it over the last 10 years). I always said that the car meant more than anything to me, just goes to show how wrong I was.
They say bad things come in 3's. I sit and wait.
A few weeks ago my father died unexpectedly. He'd been ill with Prostrate Cancer for 5 years, but was battling it well. The day before he had driven home after spending four days with me, something he did 3-4 times a year as we live 300 miles apart. It wasn't the Cancer that got him but an Infracted Bowl - don't know too much about it at the moment as we're still waiting for the full details to be released. At least it was quick, he was ill from 9pm and died the following morning. The doctor who was called during the night thought the severe stomach pain was food poisioning. At least he didn't suffer the wrath of Cancer though - small blessings.
My wife and I went for a walk 3 days after he died. We took my 'race' car as my dad would have put it; my Cosworth powered Opel Manta (4 x 4 300BHP). We parked at a local beauty spot and went for a walk. When we returned my car had gone. I spoke to an elderly couple there and then dialed 999. The poilce were the most unhelpfull, incompetent bunch of ******* I've ever had the displeasure of speaking to. They wouldn't take the call once they realised it was for a stollen car. Instead I had to make my way 5 miles to the police station to report it.
With my father dying, it put the car into perspective. It is so insignificant by comparission that I don't even care about it (even though I'd put over £30k into it over the last 10 years). I always said that the car meant more than anything to me, just goes to show how wrong I was.
They say bad things come in 3's. I sit and wait.
11 October 2007, 05:02 PM
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Have only just decided to write this thread as it's been a hard time for me recently.
A few weeks ago my father died unexpectedly. He'd been ill with Prostrate Cancer for 5 years, but was battling it well. The day before he had driven home after spending four days with me, something he did 3-4 times a year as we live 300 miles apart. It wasn't the Cancer that got him but an Infracted Bowl - don't know too much about it at the moment as we're still waiting for the full details to be released. At least it was quick, he was ill from 9pm and died the following morning. The doctor who was called during the night thought the severe stomach pain was food poisioning. At least he didn't suffer the wrath of Cancer though - small blessings.
My wife and I went for a walk 3 days after he died. We took my 'race' car as my dad would have put it; my Cosworth powered Opel Manta (4 x 4 300BHP). We parked at a local beauty spot and went for a walk. When we returned my car had gone. I spoke to an elderly couple there and then dialed 999. The poilce were the most unhelpfull, incompetent bunch of ******* I've ever had the displeasure of speaking to. They wouldn't take the call once they realised it was for a stollen car. Instead I had to make my way 5 miles to the police station to report it.
With my father dying, it put the car into perspective. It is so insignificant by comparission that I don't even care about it (even though I'd put over £30k into it over the last 10 years). I always said that the car meant more than anything to me, just goes to show how wrong I was.
They say bad things come in 3's. I sit and wait.
A few weeks ago my father died unexpectedly. He'd been ill with Prostrate Cancer for 5 years, but was battling it well. The day before he had driven home after spending four days with me, something he did 3-4 times a year as we live 300 miles apart. It wasn't the Cancer that got him but an Infracted Bowl - don't know too much about it at the moment as we're still waiting for the full details to be released. At least it was quick, he was ill from 9pm and died the following morning. The doctor who was called during the night thought the severe stomach pain was food poisioning. At least he didn't suffer the wrath of Cancer though - small blessings.
My wife and I went for a walk 3 days after he died. We took my 'race' car as my dad would have put it; my Cosworth powered Opel Manta (4 x 4 300BHP). We parked at a local beauty spot and went for a walk. When we returned my car had gone. I spoke to an elderly couple there and then dialed 999. The poilce were the most unhelpfull, incompetent bunch of ******* I've ever had the displeasure of speaking to. They wouldn't take the call once they realised it was for a stollen car. Instead I had to make my way 5 miles to the police station to report it.
With my father dying, it put the car into perspective. It is so insignificant by comparission that I don't even care about it (even though I'd put over £30k into it over the last 10 years). I always said that the car meant more than anything to me, just goes to show how wrong I was.
They say bad things come in 3's. I sit and wait.
Losing your Dad is awful... and my sincere condolences
but try to remain strong and positive, its what your Dad would want you to do.
11 October 2007, 05:12 PM
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Not good mate, sorry to hear your having a bad time Things can only get better im sure, so keep your chin up and battle on 
As for the car, im sure its heartbreaking, hopefully insured.
Things can only get better im sure, so keep your chin up and battle on As for the car, im sure its heartbreaking, hopefully insured.
11 October 2007, 06:06 PM
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Sorry to hear about your dad mate! The theft of the car is a kick in the nuts when you least needed it, but no doubt the insurance will take care of it.
There are no words to detract from the loss of your dad, but there is the certainty that no matter how painfull this must be for you right now, with a little help from those around you, you WILL get through this too!
I always thought the following lyrics taken from Marillion's song, 'Estonia', were a nice sentiment and comforting for those who have lost someone.
No one leaves you
When you live in their heart and mind
And no one dies
They just move to the other side
When we're gone
Watch the world simply carry on
We live on laughing and in no pain
We'll stay and be happy
With those who have loved us today
And we won't understand your grief
Because time is illusion
As this watery world spins around
This timeless sun
Will dry your eyes
And calm your mind
All the best,
Paul
There are no words to detract from the loss of your dad, but there is the certainty that no matter how painfull this must be for you right now, with a little help from those around you, you WILL get through this too!
I always thought the following lyrics taken from Marillion's song, 'Estonia', were a nice sentiment and comforting for those who have lost someone.
No one leaves you
When you live in their heart and mind
And no one dies
They just move to the other side
When we're gone
Watch the world simply carry on
We live on laughing and in no pain
We'll stay and be happy
With those who have loved us today
And we won't understand your grief
Because time is illusion
As this watery world spins around
This timeless sun
Will dry your eyes
And calm your mind
All the best,
Paul
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11 October 2007, 08:54 PM
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Really sorry to here you news mate, we lost my " best friend " a 13 year old collie x yeterday after having to get her put to sleep, the whole off yesterday as you can imagine has been so so sad for us all and the house will just not be the same but with the help off all out friends and all our lovely memories off our special family member am sure we will get thru it all.
I can understand your loss all be it one is an animal and one your dad but please remember that I am sure your old man would not have wanted you to feel so bad, try think off all the good memories for now buddy and am sure the rest off the pain will ease with time.
lastly the car ....yep the last thing you could have done with just now. but please do remember its a replacable item something that unfortunatly cant be said for both our own personal loss just now
thinking off you mate, let us know how things go. have obviously been very low myself over the last 48 hours so sharing my thoughts and hearing off other`s problems does help me out myself mate.
I can understand your loss all be it one is an animal and one your dad but please remember that I am sure your old man would not have wanted you to feel so bad, try think off all the good memories for now buddy and am sure the rest off the pain will ease with time.
lastly the car ....yep the last thing you could have done with just now. but please do remember its a replacable item something that unfortunatly cant be said for both our own personal loss just now
thinking off you mate, let us know how things go. have obviously been very low myself over the last 48 hours so sharing my thoughts and hearing off other`s problems does help me out myself mate.
11 October 2007, 09:42 PM
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I lost my dad in very similar circumstances - was ill with cancer, but something else killed him suddenly (not the sort of thing you want details about!).
It happened when I was 18 and put the whole of my life into perspective - the car is just 'stuff' - annoying, but replaceable.
Really sorry to hear your news.
It happened when I was 18 and put the whole of my life into perspective - the car is just 'stuff' - annoying, but replaceable.
Really sorry to hear your news.
11 October 2007, 09:59 PM
#12
Chin up mate, very sorry about your dad and I (we) cant help with that but I will be a close eye out across as many car websites as possible for Cosworth powered Manta's, sounds like an awesome creation, if I so much as sniff it I will post on here.
Things don't come in threes, but there is a tendency for you feloow man to kick you when you were down, my little lad ended up in hospital with Croup (Suspected Pneumonia as well) and some **** broke into my wifes car and nicked the radio, I gashed my hand on the glass, the door was ruined, radio gone and dash damaged, all for a £100 poxy Sony Cassette, I can only hope that Karma exists, i.e. what goes around come around.
Things don't come in threes, but there is a tendency for you feloow man to kick you when you were down, my little lad ended up in hospital with Croup (Suspected Pneumonia as well) and some **** broke into my wifes car and nicked the radio, I gashed my hand on the glass, the door was ruined, radio gone and dash damaged, all for a £100 poxy Sony Cassette, I can only hope that Karma exists, i.e. what goes around come around.
12 October 2007, 12:45 AM
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I cant say I know how you feel although we've all had our ups and downs, this must be one of the furthest downs someone can have but either way, life goes on and you have to think your father has had his life the way he wanted it and you must now live yours.
Im sorry for your loss but hope that the time you have left is used to your advantage
Good luck
Im sorry for your loss but hope that the time you have left is used to your advantage
Good luck
12 October 2007, 11:32 AM
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12 October 2007, 11:46 AM
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I am very sorry to hear about all those things. Life can be so unfair and I hope that it will all turn around for you. Hope they find the car undamaged for a start.
But as DCI says, dont assume it will get worse, expect it to go the other way.
Les
But as DCI says, dont assume it will get worse, expect it to go the other way.
Les
12 October 2007, 01:27 PM
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Thanks for the thoughts folks. Makes me feel a little less alone.
I'm glad that Fred (my dad - I always called him Fred) and I always did as much as possible together. We cycled around Europe twice, once when I was 12 and then again when I was 16. We followed the Tour de France every year. This summer we watched it in London and then out near Maidstone. Two years ago we spent two weeks in France following it around - by car - great to have spent time with the old man (he was only 69). Six weeks ago we were surfing at Hayle in Cornwall (my true home), well he was splashing me - silly old fool - I was already wet! We were like a couple of kids. He was well liked locally and we had a big turnout for his funeral. His ashes are going to be scattered at sea in Plymouth Sound as per his request - just like his father. I will join them there one day, but not for a long time if that's okay!
Jono - I'm sure you'll feel better as time goes by. The pain due to loss of a pet is just as great as that felt when a person dies. At that age you must have some great memories. Look back with fondness my friend.
J4CKO - The car was a beast, lost of power oversteer. I'm dissapointed that it was 'only' insured for about 1/3 of what it cost me to build. So, I won't be doing another........................ for the time being.
R.I.P. Fred
I'm glad that Fred (my dad - I always called him Fred) and I always did as much as possible together. We cycled around Europe twice, once when I was 12 and then again when I was 16. We followed the Tour de France every year. This summer we watched it in London and then out near Maidstone. Two years ago we spent two weeks in France following it around - by car - great to have spent time with the old man (he was only 69). Six weeks ago we were surfing at Hayle in Cornwall (my true home), well he was splashing me - silly old fool - I was already wet! We were like a couple of kids. He was well liked locally and we had a big turnout for his funeral. His ashes are going to be scattered at sea in Plymouth Sound as per his request - just like his father. I will join them there one day, but not for a long time if that's okay!
Jono - I'm sure you'll feel better as time goes by. The pain due to loss of a pet is just as great as that felt when a person dies. At that age you must have some great memories. Look back with fondness my friend.
J4CKO - The car was a beast, lost of power oversteer. I'm dissapointed that it was 'only' insured for about 1/3 of what it cost me to build. So, I won't be doing another........................ for the time being.
R.I.P. Fred
13 October 2007, 01:14 AM
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So Sorry to hear that mate, I know things look inconsolable at the minute but things will get better. You will never stop missing your Dad but things will heal in time just think of the great times you had together.
My best mate had a similar thing happen around 6 years ago. He had his girlfriend run off, Dad die and wrote off his car all in the space of 6 weeks. At the time he was broken but now he is as happy as I have ever seen him
My best mate had a similar thing happen around 6 years ago. He had his girlfriend run off, Dad die and wrote off his car all in the space of 6 weeks. At the time he was broken but now he is as happy as I have ever seen him
13 October 2007, 01:37 AM
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i'm gutted for you mate.just remember all the good times and keep your chin up.i 've had a sh*t 6 months after my fathering law die suddenly.the wife still very cut up about him.and trying to tell a 3 year old that she wont see her grandad again was heart breaking for me.
time is a great healer
time is a great healer
13 October 2007, 11:17 AM
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