Should smacking be banned?
10 April 2002, 12:47 PM
#1
Scooby Regular
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2000
Location: Weston Super Mare, Somerset.
Posts: 14,102
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Scenario. 15 month old thinks it would be fun to stick his fingers in the electric socket. The choices are:
1) Silly-***** little fella - naughty-waughty will go up in smoke (gently retrieves fingers)
or
2) Shouts and smack on hand (enough to hurt slightly) "Don't do that - it's dangerous".
I know what I would do (and did). All smacking stopped when they had knowledge of what was right and wrong. DL
spilling edit
[Edited by David Lock - 10/4/2002 12:49:31 PM]
1) Silly-***** little fella - naughty-waughty will go up in smoke (gently retrieves fingers)
or
2) Shouts and smack on hand (enough to hurt slightly) "Don't do that - it's dangerous".
I know what I would do (and did). All smacking stopped when they had knowledge of what was right and wrong. DL
spilling edit
[Edited by David Lock - 10/4/2002 12:49:31 PM]
10 April 2002, 01:44 PM
#2
Moderator
Join Date: Jul 2001
Posts: 19,910
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
So what would your solution be to a child who backchats you constantly?
You tell him/her not to do something, yet they do it again and again and again and again? Each time letting you know that they aren't listening?
Sometimes you HAVE to do something to shock the child into stopping what they are doing and enforcing your authority.
My second smacking was because I tried to shove a long nail up a socket. My dad caught me and belted my hand away very hard along with harsh words.
When I had finished with my piteous crying he sat with me for the night explaining to me why he had been so swift and harsh.
I know for a fact that he would rather have me shocked by him and crying than shocked by the socket dead.
[Edited by Little Miss WRX - 10/4/2002 1:49:11 PM]
You tell him/her not to do something, yet they do it again and again and again and again? Each time letting you know that they aren't listening?
Sometimes you HAVE to do something to shock the child into stopping what they are doing and enforcing your authority.
My second smacking was because I tried to shove a long nail up a socket. My dad caught me and belted my hand away very hard along with harsh words.
When I had finished with my piteous crying he sat with me for the night explaining to me why he had been so swift and harsh.
I know for a fact that he would rather have me shocked by him and crying than shocked by the socket dead.
[Edited by Little Miss WRX - 10/4/2002 1:49:11 PM]
10 April 2002, 05:34 PM
#4
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 2,581
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
I think you should beet the living sh1t3 out of the little sods, knock them from here to next week & if they wake up stub your **** out on their arms, then next time you go out theiving take them wiv ya, that way they'll learn the way of the land, ***** footing about should not happen, a firm hard fist cures all known prolems.
[Edited by barge - 10/4/2002 5:36:21 PM]
[Edited by barge - 10/4/2002 5:36:21 PM]
04 October 2002, 12:27 PM
#5
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: The Great White North
Posts: 25,080
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Just read this (BBC News).
So what do you think? should smacking be banned?
Personally I say NO. why? well, when I was young, if I did something wrong, I was smacked, I'm not talking about having the bejezus beaten out of me, but just a quick smack on the bum. This taught me that what I had done was wrong, and that if I did it again, I would be smacked again.
I don't see why the UN should be allowed to dictate how we raise and punish our children.
I think that some of todays problems stem from the fact that discipline is not instilled in children as it was in 'my' day (I'm 28 by the way, so not some really old fuddy duddy!). Put it this way, if I said a quarter of what kids today say to thier parents, then I would not have been able to sit down for a few hours (ok, this could be the point the UN are trying to make, but, it would have taught me a lesson)
What I want to know is, if you do not smack your child then how do you punish them to the same effect? lock them under the stairs? send them to thier room? take away their toys?
I'm sorry, but in today's age, sending a kid to thier room is probably a reward, mainly as they'll have thier CD player, playstation, tv, dvd, etc.. to play with, so it's not exactly punishing them is it?
so, what do you think?
So what do you think? should smacking be banned?
Personally I say NO. why? well, when I was young, if I did something wrong, I was smacked, I'm not talking about having the bejezus beaten out of me, but just a quick smack on the bum. This taught me that what I had done was wrong, and that if I did it again, I would be smacked again.
I don't see why the UN should be allowed to dictate how we raise and punish our children.
I think that some of todays problems stem from the fact that discipline is not instilled in children as it was in 'my' day (I'm 28 by the way, so not some really old fuddy duddy!). Put it this way, if I said a quarter of what kids today say to thier parents, then I would not have been able to sit down for a few hours (ok, this could be the point the UN are trying to make, but, it would have taught me a lesson)
What I want to know is, if you do not smack your child then how do you punish them to the same effect? lock them under the stairs? send them to thier room? take away their toys?
I'm sorry, but in today's age, sending a kid to thier room is probably a reward, mainly as they'll have thier CD player, playstation, tv, dvd, etc.. to play with, so it's not exactly punishing them is it?
so, what do you think?
04 October 2002, 12:34 PM
#6
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Essexville
Posts: 4,391
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
i got a 13 month old son, who thinks its funny to pull all my dvd's out of the rack and pull out the sky viewing card during men & motors!!!!!
he gets a slap on the wrist, but i wouldn't condone punching the &*^% out of small children.
But they do have to learn right from wrong though!!!
It will help them later on, i'm sure!!!
(mind you he still persists with his audio/visual hampering antics, the little git!!!!)
he gets a slap on the wrist, but i wouldn't condone punching the &*^% out of small children.
But they do have to learn right from wrong though!!!
It will help them later on, i'm sure!!!
(mind you he still persists with his audio/visual hampering antics, the little git!!!!)
04 October 2002, 12:37 PM
#7
Moderator
Join Date: Jul 2001
Posts: 19,910
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
I was memorably smacked four times and very hard by my dad. Each time was very warranted when I look back on them. The rest of the time a stern word was enough to stop me causing mischief. 
No, smacking should not be banned. It should be used in moderation and as a reinforcement.
There is only so much you can achieve telling a child off verbally.
If they are similar to how I was when I was a child and tend to push the boundaries all the time, then there needs to be that swift remindaer that your parents are to be listened to!!!!
No, smacking should not be banned. It should be used in moderation and as a reinforcement.
There is only so much you can achieve telling a child off verbally.
If they are similar to how I was when I was a child and tend to push the boundaries all the time, then there needs to be that swift remindaer that your parents are to be listened to!!!!
Trending Topics
04 October 2002, 12:38 PM
#8
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 9,307
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
markus, send them to their room then follow them in with a bin liner and clear the room out or anything toy related, if they slam the door take the door of the hinges until they learn some respect for the property in which they are living for FREE.
Tiggs
Tiggs
04 October 2002, 12:44 PM
#12
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 17,199
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Agreed.
There is a huge difference between a slap to the bum or back of legs or hand or something and beating 7 months of good for the roses out of a child.
I can only ever remember getting smacked twice as a child - but I still remember those occasions vividly because I knew that I had gone just that little bit too far.
We (my brothers and I) also had a great deal of respect for our mum - if she said no, it meant no. Dad too, but as he was working out of the country a lot, mum was everything to us.
We had discipline - guidlelines that were drawn, respect for those and to a certain extent, morals as well. I think my mum did a bang-up job of raising us three, pretty much by herself.
I would vote NOT to ban smacking - after many warnings, sometimes it is the last option.
And no, I don't think that "violence" is the answer - I don't condone beating or burning or anything else and yes, I *do* think that smacking is a last resort. After warnings, a controlled tap - it doesn't have to be hard - just to let the child know that they have gone too far is a method that worked for me when I was young.
TBH, I used it on my cats, too...they got warnings and I snapped my fingers, then they were removed from what they were doing, then they had their ears flicked if they persisted. Nowadays, I only have to snap my fingers at them to get them to stop what they are doing.
There is a huge difference between a slap to the bum or back of legs or hand or something and beating 7 months of good for the roses out of a child.
I can only ever remember getting smacked twice as a child - but I still remember those occasions vividly because I knew that I had gone just that little bit too far.
We (my brothers and I) also had a great deal of respect for our mum - if she said no, it meant no. Dad too, but as he was working out of the country a lot, mum was everything to us.
We had discipline - guidlelines that were drawn, respect for those and to a certain extent, morals as well. I think my mum did a bang-up job of raising us three, pretty much by herself.
I would vote NOT to ban smacking - after many warnings, sometimes it is the last option.
And no, I don't think that "violence" is the answer - I don't condone beating or burning or anything else and yes, I *do* think that smacking is a last resort. After warnings, a controlled tap - it doesn't have to be hard - just to let the child know that they have gone too far is a method that worked for me when I was young.
TBH, I used it on my cats, too...they got warnings and I snapped my fingers, then they were removed from what they were doing, then they had their ears flicked if they persisted. Nowadays, I only have to snap my fingers at them to get them to stop what they are doing.
04 October 2002, 12:46 PM
#13
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 17,199
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
send them to their room then follow them in with a bin liner and clear the room out or anything toy related,
Still, let's put last week behind us...
04 October 2002, 12:48 PM
#14
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Under your bonnet
Posts: 9,173
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
No ! smacking shouldn't be banned
Teach the little ******* the difference between right and wrong.
Not like todays kids, they get away with anything because the parents basically don't stand up for themselves.
What i mean by that as an example.
"put that packet of bicuits back jimmy"
"PUT THAT PACKET OF BISCUITS BACK JIMMY"
"ok just the one packet then"....
For **** sake parents, make your freakin mind up.
No wonder the kids run riot...
Just my slant on things
Andy
Teach the little ******* the difference between right and wrong.
Not like todays kids, they get away with anything because the parents basically don't stand up for themselves.
What i mean by that as an example.
"put that packet of bicuits back jimmy"
"PUT THAT PACKET OF BISCUITS BACK JIMMY"
"ok just the one packet then"....
For **** sake parents, make your freakin mind up.
No wonder the kids run riot...
Just my slant on things
Andy
04 October 2002, 12:55 PM
#15
Err...
I was under the impression that smacking a child under 36 months was illegal...
Just thought I'd post that here before some people get a visit from social services
Ez (over 3 now) gets a light smack if she really crosses the line - normally administered to the top of her wrist or back of her legs.
On the other hand, she regularly hits me, slaps me, pokes me whenever she feels like it
doh!
I was under the impression that smacking a child under 36 months was illegal...
Just thought I'd post that here before some people get a visit from social services
Ez (over 3 now) gets a light smack if she really crosses the line - normally administered to the top of her wrist or back of her legs.
On the other hand, she regularly hits me, slaps me, pokes me whenever she feels like it
doh!
04 October 2002, 12:59 PM
#17
Guest
Posts: n/a
I agree with you Markus, never did me any harm as a kid, taught me not to do things that I shouldn't have been doing. My 5 year old son will occasionally get a slapped wrist and a talking to if he does something dangerous or really naughty and that teaches him its wrong. Too many people don't tell their kids whats right and wrong and thats why society these days is going down the pan, because political correctness is taking over to an obscene extent where you are no longer even allowed to discipline your children [img]images/smilies/mad.gif[/img]
A slap on the wrist or backside is not the same as these people who beat 10 bells out of their kids, the problem is the PC people are categorising them in the same league
All it will lead to is more undisciplined kids going out and doing whatever they damn well please as they have never been told off for anything in their lives. The amount of kids that u see smoking ciggys or weed, drinking alcohol, out late at night hanging around with older kids teaching them bad habits etc, where the hell are their parents??? And when I say kids I'm talking 8-10 year olds
A slap on the wrist or backside is not the same as these people who beat 10 bells out of their kids, the problem is the PC people are categorising them in the same league
All it will lead to is more undisciplined kids going out and doing whatever they damn well please as they have never been told off for anything in their lives. The amount of kids that u see smoking ciggys or weed, drinking alcohol, out late at night hanging around with older kids teaching them bad habits etc, where the hell are their parents??? And when I say kids I'm talking 8-10 year olds
04 October 2002, 01:03 PM
#18
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Sep 1999
Location: £1.785m reasons not to be here :)
Posts: 6,095
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Nope, and then just shoot the little *******, on a three strikes and your out basis
That would soon cut down on teenage crime when they grow up.
Just my opinion, of course, but Markus did ask
D
That would soon cut down on teenage crime when they grow up.
Just my opinion, of course, but Markus did ask
D
04 October 2002, 01:04 PM
#19
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Essexville
Posts: 4,391
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Quote B2Zero:
"The amount of kids that u see smoking ciggys or weed, drinking alcohol, out late at night hanging around with older kids teaching them bad habits etc"
Oi sounds like you're describing yourself on a nightout with me mate!!!!!
By the way, your little boy, can teach you a few things about behaving 'your'self!!!
hahahah yep, the gist of this thread, i guess is everything in moderation!!!
i used to get a fooking wallop for backchatting, putting feet on chairs, leaving lights on.
trouble is my wife does all these things, and she hits harder than me!!!!
BB;-)
"The amount of kids that u see smoking ciggys or weed, drinking alcohol, out late at night hanging around with older kids teaching them bad habits etc"
Oi sounds like you're describing yourself on a nightout with me mate!!!!!
By the way, your little boy, can teach you a few things about behaving 'your'self!!!
hahahah yep, the gist of this thread, i guess is everything in moderation!!!
i used to get a fooking wallop for backchatting, putting feet on chairs, leaving lights on.
trouble is my wife does all these things, and she hits harder than me!!!!
BB;-)
04 October 2002, 01:05 PM
#20
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 17,199
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Gezackly....the worst swear word I knew until I was at least 15, 16...(I know - private girl's school - very sheltered! ) was "cow" or "pratt" ...Actually there was another one - sounds like "pratt" but has most of the spelling of "twit"... When I was at school that meant "idiot"...nothing more...
Nowadays, it's not uncommon to hear the f-word shouted all over the place by young children - 4+....it's horrendous.
) was "cow" or "pratt" ...Actually there was another one - sounds like "pratt" but has most of the spelling of "twit"... When I was at school that meant "idiot"...nothing more...Nowadays, it's not uncommon to hear the f-word shouted all over the place by young children - 4+....it's horrendous.
04 October 2002, 01:09 PM
#21
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Casualty or Holby City, Take your pick, it's not like that in real life!!
Posts: 4,086
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
I dragged my son by the arm and then smacked him in the street the other day for not holding my hand when I told him to, and running into the path of an oncoming car. I had abuse thrown at me from a member of the public who saw it because of how I handled it. I thanked her for her comments and informed her that next time it happens, because it will as he doesn't realise the real danger or that what he did was wrong, I will leave my 4 year old to ignore me and go onto the road to be flattened by a car. Do gooders ought to be tw*tted!
04 October 2002, 01:14 PM
#22
Guest
Posts: n/a
BB that is us out onthe town you are right
Mice I can back you up on that, my son knows all the swear words under then sun, he knows not to say them but I told him he could whisper to me what he had been told at school and I was horrified. He is getting taught these words in the playground by other 5 year olds! [img]images/smilies/mad.gif[/img] Have taken it up with the school and there is just nothing u can do to stop it. It doesnt just stop with swear words either, seems that some kids know too much at the age of 5 about sex, drugs, alcohol and god knows what else! Society in years to come is going to go rapidly down hill faster than it is now
I hate to think that my once innocent little boy is no longer so innocent which is wrong, at the age of 5 he shouldn't know about these things
It would happen one day but not at the age of 5, its so totally wrong [img]images/smilies/mad.gif[/img]
Mice I can back you up on that, my son knows all the swear words under then sun, he knows not to say them but I told him he could whisper to me what he had been told at school and I was horrified. He is getting taught these words in the playground by other 5 year olds! [img]images/smilies/mad.gif[/img] Have taken it up with the school and there is just nothing u can do to stop it. It doesnt just stop with swear words either, seems that some kids know too much at the age of 5 about sex, drugs, alcohol and god knows what else! Society in years to come is going to go rapidly down hill faster than it is now
I hate to think that my once innocent little boy is no longer so innocent which is wrong, at the age of 5 he shouldn't know about these things
It would happen one day but not at the age of 5, its so totally wrong [img]images/smilies/mad.gif[/img]
04 October 2002, 01:16 PM
#23
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: The Great White North
Posts: 25,080
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Seems I'm not alone in my views.
I think we all agree that we're not talking about beating the hell out of kiddies.
Fuzz - You got it spot on there mate. No discipline = brat. Pure and simple.
I'm not a parent, but as some on here know, I did have a long term relationship with a girl who had two children, so I can sort of comment about this type of thing. Just don't want people trying to accuse me of not knowing what I'm talking about.
The sad thing is, there is not a lot we can do about this type of thing, it's all polictical and beaureacratic (sp?)
Saying all this, if I ever do have a child then I'll probably be so soppy I won't smack them, but at that point you can all call me a hypocrite!
I think we all agree that we're not talking about beating the hell out of kiddies.
Fuzz - You got it spot on there mate. No discipline = brat. Pure and simple.
I'm not a parent, but as some on here know, I did have a long term relationship with a girl who had two children, so I can sort of comment about this type of thing. Just don't want people trying to accuse me of not knowing what I'm talking about.
The sad thing is, there is not a lot we can do about this type of thing, it's all polictical and beaureacratic (sp?)
Saying all this, if I ever do have a child then I'll probably be so soppy I won't smack them, but at that point you can all call me a hypocrite!
04 October 2002, 01:19 PM
#24
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Nov 2000
Posts: 26,619
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
I've smacked Emma (nearly 4) once. Now all I have to do is ask if she is going to behave properly or does she need me to smack her to help her remember how to behave. Invariably the same answer. Playschool teachers have remarked on how well behaved and mannerly she is, so I can't have twisted her mind too much. Lucy (20 months) is a tiny terrorist - she has a good idea of right and wrong, but I haven't smacked her as I don't think she is old enough to understand the concept of crime and punishment yet.
04 October 2002, 01:20 PM
#25
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: The Great White North
Posts: 25,080
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
innocence? what's that? a concept that has more or less dissappeared in todays world
I know that there have been some great progessions in society in the last 10 years, but I think the cons outweight the pros by a great degree.
I know that there have been some great progessions in society in the last 10 years, but I think the cons outweight the pros by a great degree.
04 October 2002, 01:30 PM
#26
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Sep 2002
Posts: 1,226
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Markus,
Couldn't agree more. My firt kid is due in a few weeks and i intend to raise him/her the same way my folks raised me. If my kid turns out like me then i'll be over the moon about it
I got a smack or two when i was a kid and it reinforces whats right and wrong... aa lot of the time it was for doing something dangerous/stupit rather than misbehaving. Thinking back, i'm glad i got a slap rather than have me continue sticking forks into plug sockets.
The way i bring up my kids is my choice.
People who need told how to raise their children by others shouldn't have them in the first place.
(oh.... good thread by the way)
Couldn't agree more. My firt kid is due in a few weeks and i intend to raise him/her the same way my folks raised me. If my kid turns out like me then i'll be over the moon about it
I got a smack or two when i was a kid and it reinforces whats right and wrong... aa lot of the time it was for doing something dangerous/stupit rather than misbehaving. Thinking back, i'm glad i got a slap rather than have me continue sticking forks into plug sockets.
The way i bring up my kids is my choice.
People who need told how to raise their children by others shouldn't have them in the first place.
(oh.... good thread by the way)
04 October 2002, 01:34 PM
#27
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Some country and western
Posts: 13,488
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
I do like the way people talk about smacking.
...You are hitting your children.........that right HITTING them!
You get in to a fight in a pub, do you smack them?....nope you HIT them, its the same....
You call it smacking because it makes you feel better! ask a child what a smack is.....they will say its hitting them
As far as I am concerned you are all guilty of hitting your kids [img]images/smilies/mad.gif[/img]
Shame on you
...You are hitting your children.........that right HITTING them!
You get in to a fight in a pub, do you smack them?....nope you HIT them, its the same....
You call it smacking because it makes you feel better! ask a child what a smack is.....they will say its hitting them
As far as I am concerned you are all guilty of hitting your kids [img]images/smilies/mad.gif[/img]
Shame on you
04 October 2002, 01:34 PM
#28
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Apr 1999
Posts: 1,335
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
The problem with social workers, do-gooders and the UN stems from a refusal to accept the difference between a smack and a hit. A smack is delivered by a parent who is in full control of their emotions and is usually made with the palm of the hand. A hit is delivered by a parent who has lost control of their emotions and can be delivered by a hand, fist, foot, etc.. Lawyers are quite happy to support this because they know that it will generate a huge long-term supply of court cases.
Smacking is not ideal, but sometimes it is the only way to reassert control and to remind children that there are certain lines that cannot be crossed. There are countless studies showing that children whose parents enforce limits (behaviour, language, staying out) are much happier, less prone to emotional problems and less prone to criminal behaviour.
It's ironic that the more freedoms that are given to adults and the more permissive we become as a society, the more we try to preserve the innocence of childhood.
Smacking is not ideal, but sometimes it is the only way to reassert control and to remind children that there are certain lines that cannot be crossed. There are countless studies showing that children whose parents enforce limits (behaviour, language, staying out) are much happier, less prone to emotional problems and less prone to criminal behaviour.
It's ironic that the more freedoms that are given to adults and the more permissive we become as a society, the more we try to preserve the innocence of childhood.
04 October 2002, 01:41 PM
#29
Guest
Posts: n/a
davyboy u r a very sad man if you can not distinguish between a parent giving a child who has just done something dangerous a smack and someone in the pub hitting someone else
Smack does NOT = punch in the face or kick in the stomach, smack = a restrained and controlled slap with an open hand on the wrist, bottom or back of the legs. If you think thats the same as punching someone then I suggest you see a dr to help you with your lack of judgement
Smack does NOT = punch in the face or kick in the stomach, smack = a restrained and controlled slap with an open hand on the wrist, bottom or back of the legs. If you think thats the same as punching someone then I suggest you see a dr to help you with your lack of judgement
04 October 2002, 01:42 PM
#30
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: The Great White North
Posts: 25,080
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
davyboy,
do you have kids? just curious.
So we should be ashamed of punishing our kids for doing wrong? for teaching them, albeit with mild violence, right from wrong?
Please tell me how you would deal with, for example, this situation.
Your 5 year old child, runs out into the road from behind two parked cars and nearly gets run over. What do you do? do you give them a gentle smack... sorry, HIT THEM? and tell them it was silly and dangerous? if not then what do you do? tell them "no johnny, don't do that again, silly boy" then let them go and do it again and this time end up dead on the road.
do you have kids? just curious.
So we should be ashamed of punishing our kids for doing wrong? for teaching them, albeit with mild violence, right from wrong?
Please tell me how you would deal with, for example, this situation.
Your 5 year old child, runs out into the road from behind two parked cars and nearly gets run over. What do you do? do you give them a gentle smack... sorry, HIT THEM? and tell them it was silly and dangerous? if not then what do you do? tell them "no johnny, don't do that again, silly boy" then let them go and do it again and this time end up dead on the road.