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Famous Jade Conversations...

Old Jul 23, 2002 | 03:36 PM
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Talking


Number 1.
=========


Spencer: "You know you see those people in Venice standing on the back of gondolas, pushing it around?"

Jade: "They don't do that on the Thames though, do they?"

Spencer: "No. I don't work on the Thames. I work in Cambridge."

Jade: "Is there not the Thames there?"

Spencer: "No!"

Jade: "Is there a river called the Cambridge river?"

Spencer: "Yeah, it's called the Cam."

Jade: "Really? You swear? I only thought there was the Thames. I thought that was the main one in London."

Spencer: "It is. I don't live in London."

Jade: "I'm confused. I thought Cambridge was in London. I knew Birmingham weren't in London."

Spencer: "Would you like to go and tell the group what you just said?"

Jade: "No..."

Spencer: "Cambridge is a city."

Jade: "But we've got a city in London."

Spencer: "Yes. This city is called London. And there's different parts of it. Cambridge is a city."

Jade: "Of where? Kent?"

Jade: "Well England's a country, London's a city, Bermondsey's just a throw-off. Now where are you? What's your country, and what's your things?"

Spencer: "What country am I from? England. The city is called Cambridge, the county Cambridgeshire."

Jade: "So not Kent then?"

Spencer: "Nooooo.... The region is called East Anglia."

Jade: "East Angular? That's abroad. Is there not a place called East Angular abroad?"

Spencer: "Jade, have you been taking the stupid pills again?"

Jade: "Every time people tell me they work in East Angular, I actually think they're talking about near Tunisia and places like that. Am I thick?"

Spencer: "Well, I hate to say it, but you are."

Jade: "Cos Scottish and Irish and all that comes under England, doesn't it?"

Spencer: "No... They come under Great Britain. Scotland and Wales have their own flags. Northern Ireland and Ireland are different."

Jade: "So they're not together? Where's Berlin?"

Spencer: "Germany..."



Number 2.
=========
what was either a brave attempt at small talk or a cunning plan to get her out of the country, Tim has suggested Jade should try life in the USA.

An excited Jade asked: "What would I do, obviously you know I'm not very intelligent, become a waitress?"

Ever helpful Tim said she could do a course and become a beautician, "There's hundreds over there."

Jade, thinking in terms of Hollywood hopefuls of the past said: "I can see myself in Los Angeles living in a one star hotel."

"Rent a small flat," Tim suggested.

And, excited by the prospect of a new life in the California sun, Jade needed only a little more reassurance, "They do speak English there don't they?"




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Old Jul 23, 2002 | 04:24 PM
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Is conversation 1 a transcript?

OMFG, I cannot believe people like this are allowed to breed!!!!!
Perhaps the ugliness is Evolution in action. Breeding is very unlikely?
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Old Jul 23, 2002 | 04:26 PM
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Class - Ohh how we'll miss her!
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Old Jul 23, 2002 | 04:42 PM
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chiark, Evolution didn't account for beer
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Old Jul 23, 2002 | 04:45 PM
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Guy, please tell me you haven't been there!!!!
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Old Jul 23, 2002 | 04:58 PM
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I knew I left myself open for that one

It would be a catch22 situation. To be able to contemplate it I would need that much beer that it would not be possible to perform the act..............an no I haven't been there






She knocked me back!
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Old Jul 23, 2002 | 06:57 PM
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There are loads of dogs like her and the men to match......Seen a few in scoobies now that they have become common..
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Old Jul 23, 2002 | 07:22 PM
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Luke, You want to stop looking at yourself in that rear view mirror
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Old Jul 23, 2002 | 07:30 PM
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sti, you say that to my face and my pitbull will eat your ***.
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Old Jul 23, 2002 | 07:45 PM
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I'd say that's a bite
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Old Jul 23, 2002 | 08:37 PM
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.... hence my idea for IQ related breeding rights
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Old Jul 23, 2002 | 11:58 PM
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Portugals in Spain init?? Oh my god how I wet myself!! Had I not known that people like that exsist I wouldnt have believed it - BUT THEY DO!!!!!!

These people seem to be lacking something in the learning department of the brain - they are taught the same, but it just doesnt work right and gets lost?? why??

Pete
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Old Jul 24, 2002 | 09:46 AM
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Does anyone know if she actually went to school, and if so, how many GCSE's did she get?
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Old Jul 24, 2002 | 10:53 AM
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I doubt she can spell GCSE, let alone take any....

I'm sure her Geography paper would be quite amusing though.....

Subhumans like her will breed a race of true imbeciles so she should either be culled or have all birth rights removed - the former would be better of course in order to improve her physical appearance.....

Luckily her looks match her intelligence - so theres no doubting what any poor bloke is letting himself into (or herself if she follows her mother)

As for her mother... The Missing Link springs to mind


This is purely my opinion of course

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Old Jul 24, 2002 | 10:53 AM
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Other shocking Jade quotes.....

My favorite is "No I'm not going to be an Escape Goat"

Matt
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Old Jul 24, 2002 | 11:20 AM
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Wow, who knew Jade had read the Odyssey?
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Old Jul 24, 2002 | 01:16 PM
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"What, they speak Portuganeese in Portugal"...
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Old Jul 24, 2002 | 01:23 PM
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The funny thing is, the latest poles show that she is favorite to win..... What is this country comming to? East Angular?
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Old Jul 24, 2002 | 01:26 PM
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none of the decent polls have her ahead, on digital spy (most acurate poll all through BB) she is on 4%

T
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Old Jul 24, 2002 | 01:29 PM
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[relief]
Thank god. Some breakfast show this morning did their own poll, and she got 48%. People must have been ******* about.
[/relief]
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Old Jul 24, 2002 | 01:32 PM
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it was sad when she claimed not to have or even understand what tictacs were when the other were discussing tactics
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Old Jul 24, 2002 | 01:33 PM
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Not a chance she will win. I predict (in reverse order so the order in which they leave the house):

Jade
Johnny
Alex
Kate

I was thinking Alex will win but Kate has both the male and female population voting for her. My girlfriend has already voted for her 15 times.....
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Old Jul 24, 2002 | 01:37 PM
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the only thing that will enable kate to win is if jonny falls lower in the voting- at the moment there is a jonny/kate V alex fan base- therefore the split kate and jonny vote will not beat alex....but as ppl realise that jonny is a stupid monkey they will desert him in favour of kate.

Tiggs

ps- depends how C4 edit kate/alex over the next 2 days.
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Old Jul 25, 2002 | 12:29 AM
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Anyone else think Johny was a bit dodgy towards Kate when she was drunk, or am i getting possesive .
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Old Jul 25, 2002 | 08:15 AM
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But I'm not a minger!
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Old Jul 25, 2002 | 08:27 AM
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If Bowser (Jade) wins I'm off I'll become Portuganese

But I can't see anyone other than Alex winning.

[Edited by RB170 - 7/25/2002 8:29:46 AM]
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