Childcare costs?
#91
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Originally Posted by **************
LOL don't even start me on paternity leave I get no paid paternity leave at work
#92
Originally Posted by **************
LOL don't even start me on paternity leave I get no paid paternity leave at work
#93
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Originally Posted by Clarebabes
I mean, how many Mums go to coffee mornings these days?
only twice a week mind, and i've told her she can only have a sticky bun every other week.
#95
Christ on a bike B2Z....no-one forced you into having a child!!
You can't say you didn't know the financial situation before you had one......
You seem to want everyone but yourself to fund the child's upbringing!!
You can't say you didn't know the financial situation before you had one......
You seem to want everyone but yourself to fund the child's upbringing!!
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Originally Posted by **************
Yeah I know but thats not a viable option for me PC.
#97
Originally Posted by imlach
It does raise another debate. The number of working mothers with children under 2-3 years of age is HUGE compared to a generation ago.
What does this tell us? It tells me that everyone is now more financially stretched and wants to support the majority of the lifestyle they had pre-children.
If I think back to my childhood, most of my friends mothers didn't work....nowadays, it is very rare to find a non-working mother.
It's because we all want too much now. 2nd cars, conservatories, 2 foreign holidays, and generally a lifestyle we can't all afford - or rather, one that when children come along, the children seem to come after a Subaru
Number of families I remember in the 70's with 2 cars? None. Number now? Loads. Lazy lard a$$es
What does this tell us? It tells me that everyone is now more financially stretched and wants to support the majority of the lifestyle they had pre-children.
If I think back to my childhood, most of my friends mothers didn't work....nowadays, it is very rare to find a non-working mother.
It's because we all want too much now. 2nd cars, conservatories, 2 foreign holidays, and generally a lifestyle we can't all afford - or rather, one that when children come along, the children seem to come after a Subaru
Number of families I remember in the 70's with 2 cars? None. Number now? Loads. Lazy lard a$$es
Women got better education, and it was no longer considered strange for them to go to universities, and from then on into careers.
House prices have risen in many areas, which has meant that there's a need for more income, particularly as in many cases the sorts of reasonably well-paid manual jobs (docker/miner/steelworker) have either declined or disappeared. Hence the rise of the working working-class mum, together with the middle-class career mum.
And yes, our expectations have risen as well - it took my father until he was 60 to have enough disposable cash that he could buy his first new car ....... I managed it (and what a stupid mistake it was - never again) when I was 23. We never had a family foreign holiday .... I've had a foreign holiday (usually two) every year for the last 15. Then again, I only ever buy secondhand cars now, I won't pay for Sky, don't eat out much, don't smoke, and buy no expensive clothes (other than suits for work). And no, there's no debt other than the mortgage.
#98
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imlach no I ******* didn't. No one has funded my eldest except me and thats not going to change for my newborn. You realy are an annoying tw@t accusing me of stuff I haven't said. Are you just on a wind up or are you really that much of a cvnt in real life?
I'm just saying that the majority of the companies I have worked for, friends work for etc all give their employees at least 1 week on full pay if not 2 weeks on full pay. How can you take 2 weeks off for only £200 pay when you are trying to pay for everything else. The Government gives mothers 6 months on maternity pay yet can't even give fathers 1 week on full pay. I also know that none of them would take 2 weeks off unpaid (£200 for the two weeks) if thats all they were allowed.
I know the answer, change my employer, but not going to benefit me much now, only in the future. Its just another case of dads getting a raw deal with their kids.
I'm just saying that the majority of the companies I have worked for, friends work for etc all give their employees at least 1 week on full pay if not 2 weeks on full pay. How can you take 2 weeks off for only £200 pay when you are trying to pay for everything else. The Government gives mothers 6 months on maternity pay yet can't even give fathers 1 week on full pay. I also know that none of them would take 2 weeks off unpaid (£200 for the two weeks) if thats all they were allowed.
I know the answer, change my employer, but not going to benefit me much now, only in the future. Its just another case of dads getting a raw deal with their kids.
#99
Originally Posted by **************
imlach no I ******* didn't. No one has funded my eldest except me and thats not going to change for my newborn. You realy are an annoying tw@t accusing me of stuff I haven't said. Are you just on a wind up or are you really that much of a cvnt in real life?
Who created this child? Whose choice was it to bring it into the world?
#100
Originally Posted by **************
Its just another case of dads getting a raw deal with their kids.
As for women being on maternity pay for 6 months; yes, there is something payable, but no, it's not full pay for very long at all. More like £50/week after the first 6 weeks, or at least something like that.
#101
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Thats not going to stop me having children, its simply saying the Government could do more to help familys cope and stay a family and get back to work instead of giving out endless amounts of benefits to lazy no good scum who claim the benefits they do because its a better alternative to going to work or staying as a family. The people who want to work, want to stay as a family are the ones who don't get help, the ones who want to claim off the state and give nothing back are the ones who get all the help. Why shouldn't I be given one week off paternity leave - or any father more to the point? We all pay our taxes and National Insurance, work our socks off and then get fcuked over because the Government is more interested in helping lazy scumbags.
#102
Originally Posted by **************
Thats not going to stop me having children, its simply saying the Government could do more to help familys cope and stay a family and get back to work instead of giving out endless amounts of benefits to lazy no good scum who claim the benefits they do because its a better alternative to going to work or staying as a family. The people who want to work, want to stay as a family are the ones who don't get help, the ones who want to claim off the state and give nothing back are the ones who get all the help. Why shouldn't I be given one week off paternity leave - or any father more to the point? We all pay our taxes and National Insurance, work our socks off and then get fcuked over because the Government is more interested in helping lazy scumbags.
#103
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Moose yes its good that companies are doing that and it shows that they can afford it, so what i'm suggesting is that the Government make it a legal requirement, for most companies it wont make a difference as they already do it or more, but for the tight ar$e ones like the one I work for it will stop them from giving their employees a rough deal and every parent will get at least one week at home with their new kid without having to worry about not being paid for it!
#104
Originally Posted by **************
Moose yes its good that companies are doing that and it shows that they can afford it, so what i'm suggesting is that the Government make it a legal requirement, for most companies it wont make a difference as they already do it or more, but for the tight ar$e ones like the one I work for it will stop them from giving their employees a rough deal and every parent will get at least one week at home with their new kid without having to worry about not being paid for it!
#105
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There is when its all used up with my eldest son by court order, the only time I get to spend more than a couple of days at a time with him. Yes I have put aside the time I have left over but its less than a weeks worth.
If the Government goes ahead with plans (if I heard right recently) to increase statutary annual leave for employees to 1 week more than what it is now then obviously this is an alternative to the 1 weeks paternity leave.
If the Government goes ahead with plans (if I heard right recently) to increase statutary annual leave for employees to 1 week more than what it is now then obviously this is an alternative to the 1 weeks paternity leave.
#106
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I know this won't help. but have you got any holiday left? If so, can't you use that for a week?
And as for Mum's getting paid maternity pay, it's 90% of your usual salary for 6 weeks and the rest at £102.50 per week, same as paternity pay. Women can't work when they have a baby and father's can.
What I did was work as near to my due date as possible - 2 weeks before - and then get the maximum benefit of the 90% after the baby is born. I would rather do that as money is more important after the child is born.
Lifestyle changes are needed. When I had Hollie, I was used to having my own money and doing with it what I wanted. When I had to go to her Dad for handouts, it was severely demoralising for me and a pain in the *** for him. I think a major contributory factor to us splitting up was money, (especially as when I went back to work after 6 months, I was on more money than him......)
And as for Mum's getting paid maternity pay, it's 90% of your usual salary for 6 weeks and the rest at £102.50 per week, same as paternity pay. Women can't work when they have a baby and father's can.
What I did was work as near to my due date as possible - 2 weeks before - and then get the maximum benefit of the 90% after the baby is born. I would rather do that as money is more important after the child is born.
Lifestyle changes are needed. When I had Hollie, I was used to having my own money and doing with it what I wanted. When I had to go to her Dad for handouts, it was severely demoralising for me and a pain in the *** for him. I think a major contributory factor to us splitting up was money, (especially as when I went back to work after 6 months, I was on more money than him......)
#107
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Sorry, didn't see the posts about holiday.
When are they planning to increase annual leave? Can't wait for that. I think 20 days is pants, especially when you have to save 3 or 4 days for Christmas!
With stress levels at an all-time high and the burden this creates on the NHS, they should be forcing us to have more time off. Don't even get me started on pensions and having to work until we're 70! What jobs will be left then for us to do?
When are they planning to increase annual leave? Can't wait for that. I think 20 days is pants, especially when you have to save 3 or 4 days for Christmas!
With stress levels at an all-time high and the burden this creates on the NHS, they should be forcing us to have more time off. Don't even get me started on pensions and having to work until we're 70! What jobs will be left then for us to do?
#108
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I don't know if it was just something they were looking into as a vote winner or whether its really going to happen, heard something about several weeks ago in the news but nothing more since.
Increased annual leave obviously helps on all fronts for having time at home with your kids, paternity leave and less child care fees. Working from home is also something that could be promoted more, I could do a fair amount of my job by dialling into work from home but it would never even be considered by my employer, as it wouldn't by most employers. This is something that could help out a lot of working parents if companies actually let their employees work a portion of their week in this way.
Increased annual leave obviously helps on all fronts for having time at home with your kids, paternity leave and less child care fees. Working from home is also something that could be promoted more, I could do a fair amount of my job by dialling into work from home but it would never even be considered by my employer, as it wouldn't by most employers. This is something that could help out a lot of working parents if companies actually let their employees work a portion of their week in this way.
#110
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always a toughy this one, and everyone has their views and opinions...
my side of it is that,
i had my son 20 months ago when mine and my partners wagers were very low, we bought our flat and moved in when my boy was a month old, and we struggled like hell, for me to go back to work in the job i was doing would of meant i was actually bringing home a minus figure after paying childcare, my family live 50mile away so that wasnt an option!
so i didnt go back to work, we got child tax credits of about £25 a week, and working tax credit of a whopping £6 for the first 12 months, and this tax year they are taking £3 back out of the working tax as they say they over paid us!!
my partner was at the time bringing home £200 a week!
it wasnt viable for me to go back to work unless i could get a job that would pay me at least £8-50p an hour, and not many do down here!!
all i can say is, no matter how bleak it looks now, you WILL fiind a way to manage and to still have a bit of a life too, we did, wasnt anything extravagant, but we had happy times and still managed to have fun and stuff, and pay all our bills!
things get easier, like i say you find a way and do what you have to do at the end of the day!
my partner chucked his job in and went self employed, back to carpentry, not so secure etc and can be stressfull when you dont know when the next job is coming in but so far so good, been busy as hell and earning fantastic money!
dont panic about it now, not if baby due in just a months time, enjoy your last month of being pregnant and look forward to being parents... you have so much joy about to bounce into your lives dont mar it by worrying too much, things always have a habit of sorting themselves out eventually!
good luck
x
my side of it is that,
i had my son 20 months ago when mine and my partners wagers were very low, we bought our flat and moved in when my boy was a month old, and we struggled like hell, for me to go back to work in the job i was doing would of meant i was actually bringing home a minus figure after paying childcare, my family live 50mile away so that wasnt an option!
so i didnt go back to work, we got child tax credits of about £25 a week, and working tax credit of a whopping £6 for the first 12 months, and this tax year they are taking £3 back out of the working tax as they say they over paid us!!
my partner was at the time bringing home £200 a week!
it wasnt viable for me to go back to work unless i could get a job that would pay me at least £8-50p an hour, and not many do down here!!
all i can say is, no matter how bleak it looks now, you WILL fiind a way to manage and to still have a bit of a life too, we did, wasnt anything extravagant, but we had happy times and still managed to have fun and stuff, and pay all our bills!
things get easier, like i say you find a way and do what you have to do at the end of the day!
my partner chucked his job in and went self employed, back to carpentry, not so secure etc and can be stressfull when you dont know when the next job is coming in but so far so good, been busy as hell and earning fantastic money!
dont panic about it now, not if baby due in just a months time, enjoy your last month of being pregnant and look forward to being parents... you have so much joy about to bounce into your lives dont mar it by worrying too much, things always have a habit of sorting themselves out eventually!
good luck
x
#112
Agree with Scoobyangel - I've seen so many friends who have just coped.....one with 4 kids. You do what you have to do, and yes, there'll be hard times, and nice things you just can't afford, but you just get on with it and deal with it.
#113
So spooky – you could have been me a year ago Bravo!!!!
Not being possessed of awesome intelligence and pecuniary foresight (I was just a happy prospective dad) I was very disappointed when the penny dropped that it was going to be financially absurd for the missus to go back to work. I earn a good wage – so why should I worry too much? Well truth is the government snooker you (ohh and themselves) which makes NO sense to me - they gain no taxes from having ‘the mother’ back at work which in turn pays for other people to look after their child who then pay taxes etc etc. This is primarily based on childcare costs down here being £1100 pcm :eek
So, my family’s reward for wanting a child and for me paying a lot of taxes is that we are financially penalised into making the missus stay at home and my child is not allowed to socialise with other kids at a nursery (its would be good for her development…). Hardly stimulating for either… Add in a second child and it becomes an absurd notion.
So, we seriously cut back and bide the time till nipper 1 and prospective nipper 2 go to school. And before any holier than thou comments, this is not a whinge, it is an explanation of the leg iron that many families find themselves in. I don’t really consider it fair on me, but find it particularly unfair on missus & child. There should be a SLIDING family tax allowance based on mothers back to work income that enables it to make sense.
Not being possessed of awesome intelligence and pecuniary foresight (I was just a happy prospective dad) I was very disappointed when the penny dropped that it was going to be financially absurd for the missus to go back to work. I earn a good wage – so why should I worry too much? Well truth is the government snooker you (ohh and themselves) which makes NO sense to me - they gain no taxes from having ‘the mother’ back at work which in turn pays for other people to look after their child who then pay taxes etc etc. This is primarily based on childcare costs down here being £1100 pcm :eek
So, my family’s reward for wanting a child and for me paying a lot of taxes is that we are financially penalised into making the missus stay at home and my child is not allowed to socialise with other kids at a nursery (its would be good for her development…). Hardly stimulating for either… Add in a second child and it becomes an absurd notion.
So, we seriously cut back and bide the time till nipper 1 and prospective nipper 2 go to school. And before any holier than thou comments, this is not a whinge, it is an explanation of the leg iron that many families find themselves in. I don’t really consider it fair on me, but find it particularly unfair on missus & child. There should be a SLIDING family tax allowance based on mothers back to work income that enables it to make sense.
Last edited by Diesel; 13 October 2004 at 10:28 PM.
#114
Originally Posted by Diesel
So, we seriously cut back and bide the time till nipper 1 and prospective nipper 2 go to school.
#116
Originally Posted by Diesel
SSo, my family’s reward for wanting a child and for me paying a lot of taxes is that we are financially penalised into making the missus stay at home and my child is not allowed to socialise with other kids at a nursery (its would be good for her development…).
So, we seriously cut back......
So, we seriously cut back......
Of course, I couldn't possibly comment on your contribution to a recent thread about an Audi S4 selling for £15k+....
I WILL be buying a hot estate car within the next few weeks so I will bear yours in mind if I fall for an S4 after having a test drive slighly more locally!
Last edited by imlach; 14 October 2004 at 10:26 AM.
#117
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This thread took off a bit. Some interesting comments and I agree with Imlach to some extent about nobody made me get pregnant etc. Circumstances have really changed though in the last 8months for me so whereas a child before was going to be financially quite tight,for me now, its just impossible
I'm getting organised though, and i've got until March to really start paniking
Thanks for replies and at some of B2Z's replies
I'm getting organised though, and i've got until March to really start paniking
Thanks for replies and at some of B2Z's replies
#118
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Breathing space idea - can you park the scoob somewhere for six months or a year, get a SORN, and use the (smelly) Fiesta? You keep scoob and don't lose money on resale, but it might save you a grand for one year on tax and insurance (I reckon the saving on fuel would be negligible if you don't use it for commuting). I don't know if the grand is most useful in the first, second, third etc year of a child's life, but it's a thought.
#119
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Originally Posted by Brendan Hughes
Breathing space idea - can you park the scoob somewhere for six months or a year, get a SORN, and use the (smelly) Fiesta? You keep scoob and don't lose money on resale, but it might save you a grand for one year on tax and insurance (I reckon the saving on fuel would be negligible if you don't use it for commuting). I don't know if the grand is most useful in the first, second, third etc year of a child's life, but it's a thought.
I think i might have to resort to my old student tactics regards buying food for myself though, pasta, pasta and errrm more pasta (Tesco value of course )
#120
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Originally Posted by imlach
AFAIK, not school, but nursery at 3 years old. That's when childcare becomes free if you find a nursery place that can be funded (no idea as to how difficult this is - but our local privately run nursery does it).
Like I said before, I got vouchers when she was 3 1/2, but nothing was ever provided free
Do you have the link to where it says it is free, cos I will demand a refund!