ok, nice Interest thread. How do you Launder 4 million quid?
 

I've worked for the financial industry for 15 years and had countless presentations and videos on money laundering.

if i was a crim, i think i'd be pretty lousy.


so, you've got yer 4mill in used 10s and 20s. what then?

I'm all ears :norty:

Feel free to pay off my incurred IHT ;)

I'd have a word with a local "businessman" ;) and ask if he'd push it through his normal channels, for 2% of the total.

Tanning salons, Amusement arcades, etc.

uhmm, i thought of running an amusement park - valid cash heavy business.

seems a bit obvious to the police i'd reckon.

Car Sales ;)

Saying no more :D

Buying & leasing out Industrial Units, buying & selling construction & plant equipment. Buying & selling commercial vehicles & buses.
:)

stick it in van and fook off to switzerland:D:D:D

open up a local dry cleaners

I would of though you need to run a business that:

doesnt buy stock (provides a service)

CAn have an infinate number of sales with out raising questions.

deals in cash in reasonable amounts but under the HMRC limits

They would check how many staff you had, how long does it take to process one item etc They would soon work out how much you should be taking!

run a brothel then........maybe:wonder:

I'd buy a big hangover.

Couldnt run a brothel because that would be illegal, so it would have to be a spa ;)

But same rules as the dry cleaners you can only have so many staff who can do a certain amount of "work" ;)

Errrrr, you've missed my humourous quip ;) Think, what does a dry cleaners do? They launder :D

4m needs to laundered in a massive network of financial transactions, and be prepared to lose a large chunk of it in fees... it would probably take a good couple of years and you'll probably need to get as much of it in dollar accounts and involve a lot of eatern european businesses...

Why dollar acounts :confused:

I would imagine that taking a large sum of cash to eastern europe would result in a pretty quick death :o

Quite simply once money leaves the EU it is one step further in making any investigators job a little harder :)

Gotta be the best way!

Cash deals, Imaginary customers, Make up reciept, pay tax = laundared money=back pocket, big house, fast scooby!

Get it into Northern Cyprus - not recognised by many States, so no extradition treaties and lax financial controls and then put it through one of the numerous 'questionable' banks that exist there. Apparantly it is one of the favoured routes for the Russian Mafia to 'legitimise' money.

You get twenty mates to go to Cheltenham with you for the four day festival and chuck as much money down as you can, each of you on a different nag. If you walk away with 2 million clean you've had a result. This is where most of the cash headed after the bank robbery in Belfast last year.

Otherwise you pay somebody around 40% to do it for you.

So I'm told! ;)

Loan it to the Labour Party.

Buy expensive watches and give them to Labour MPs. Get the MPs to declare them for £125. A couple of years later ask the MPs to sell it for a market price and you take the money back whilst giving the MP a nice holiday.

Gift it to a Labour MPs husband who's meant to be good with the books.

how would you come up with the money to buy an amusement park or any other legitimate business to start off?

fair point buying an amusement park. the previous owner would be wary of taking 100K in cash himself.

can you put down 7 grand in cash in a jewellers to buy you beloved rolex daytona?

can you put in varying amounts of thousands (say less than 10 each time) into your bank account from various branches - do the computers raise an alarm for regular cash injections like they do for irregular credit card use?

when does cash arouse suspicion in local shops??

Bank staff are trained to quiz you about why you are paying in or taking out large sums of cash. You think they are just making conversation eg "Oh, are you treating yourself today" but really they have to submit a form afterwards with the info they gained from you. I recently paid in £8000 in fifty pound notes after I sold my Scoob and then two weeks later withdrew £13,500 in twenty pound notes to buy my new car. The amount of questions I got asked was unreal, although im not complaining because if someone else was drawing it out of my account I would want the bank to catch them!!

Si