Not sure if there has been a Blackadder quotes thread before but here's my favourite:
Captain Flashart: "....treat your aeroplane like you treat your women.....get inside her five times a day and take her to heaven and back...." Brilliant! Cheers, Darren. |
Sausage!!!!!!!
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OK darling!!!!
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Real Green
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"I heard it was 'cos a guy called Archie Duke got hungry so he shot an ostrich !"
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Row row row your boat, gently down the stream
Belts off, trousers down, isn't life a scream. Woof! :D |
"I've had a good idea"
"Be carefull, you're foot might fall off" "Why?" "My brother had the good idea of cutting his toe-nails with a scythe and his foot fell off" Absolute Genius.... I think of it every time someone says "I've got a good idea" |
Hot Sex Madrigal in the Middle of my Tights.
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<Lord Flashheart>
The last time I said ''I Love You''....and 30 seconds later she was pregnant WOOF! WOOF!:D:D ..and my favourite ''AAARRGGHH!'' ''barbed wire sir?'' ''no Baldrick,I've just put my elbow in a blob of ice-cream!!'' [Edited by Elmer Fudpucker - 10/16/2003 8:46:42 PM] |
the situation we are in is as sticky as when sticky the stick insect got stuck on a sticky bun:)
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A plan so cunning you could put a tail on it and call it a badger
Steve PS or was it fox :O |
"captain blackadder did not shoot that delicious plump breasted pigeon"
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"I think I'll write my tombstone - Here lies Edmund Blackadder, and he's bloody annoyed."
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Blackadder: "...speaking of which, where is the crew?"
Redbeard: "oh, we don't have a crew" Blackadder: "but I thought all ships had a crew?!" Redbeard: "opinions are divided on the matter.... I say you don't need a crew, all the other captains say you do!" Blackadder: "We're dead!" :D |
G: "If we do happen to step on a mine, Sir, what do we do ?"
EB: "Normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump 200 feet in the air and scatter oneself over a wide area." |
Bob?
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Blackadder to Mr Ploppy the jailer.
"I would shake your hand but I fear it may come off" This is the funniest sketch ever! |
"a turnip shaped like a thingy"
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"I laugh in the face of fear and tweak the nose of the dreadful spindly killer fish" :D
My all time favourite Black Adder line :D |
Out of my way or I’ll give your girlie back home something to hang her bath towels on WOOF |
The stickiest situation since sticky the stick insect got stuck to a sticky bun.
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How about ?
Priest. are you Edmund,Duke of Edinburgh? Edmund. no,,I'm a bowl of soup or Harry. Ah! Edmund,I'm glad I've caught you Edmund. Er,doing what,exactly? First series rules ! |
"Just a wild stab in the dark ... which is what you'll be getting if you don't start being more co-operative"
"As cunning as a fox who's just been made professor of cunning at Oxford university" "Percy , you look like a bird who's swallowed a plate" Balders: Four. Blackadder: What? Balders: Some beans and some beans is four . Flash (about kate/bob): She's got a tongue like an electric eel and she likes the taste of a man's tonsils. And many, many more. |
In short, a German spy is giving away every one of our battle plans.
You look surprised, Blackadder. I cerainly am, sir. I didn't realise we _had_ any battle plans. -- Cpt. Darling, Melchett and Edmund : General Hospital And if you come back with information, Captain Darling will pump you thoroughly in the debriefing room. ...Not while I've got my strength he won't. -- Melchett and Edmund : General Hospital We tell HQ I've gone insane, and I'll be invalided back home to Blighty before you can say 'Wibble'. Poor, gormless idiot. But I'm a poor, gormless idiot, and I've never been invalided back to Blighty. Ah yes, Baldrick, but that's because you never said, 'Wibble'. -- Edmund and Baldrick : Goodbyeee... |
READY-AIM-FIRE !!! Wait for it..... wait for it!!! :D
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Doc - "So you've started fancying boys and naturally you're worried"
EB - "No !" Doc - "Bloody hell I would be ! It's not everyday a man wakes up to find he's a stark raving bender with no more right to live on Gods clean earth than a weasel" :D |
"What we have here madam, is the very latest in front wall high elevation orifices, with a wide capacity gutter installation below."
"You mean, you crap out of the window ?" |
B - "Dog; not a cat"
EB - "and how about "C" ?" B - "C, big blue wobbly thing what fish live in." |
And who could forget;
"Seen it, pinched it, spent it" |
"You'd like a table...not too near the band...in the name of Uberlointnent Von Genschler.......I think you may have the wrong number"
Capt. E.B. in the trenches. |
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