For all newbies - a guide on how to answer those threads looking for advice!
A guide for all newbies on here: how to answer threads looking for advice.
Firstly you may well ask why you would want to answer any thread asking for advice when you probably don't know the answer as you're new to the Subaru scene. Well until recently you'd have had a point, but it now seems that you should indeed answer any thread asking for advice to make yourself feel important and 'part of the community'. So how can you answer these threads when you don't know the answer? Choose from any of the following options: 1) If the thread is from a poster asking for the valuation on a car then make a 'to get the ball rolling' type post plucking a figure from the air. Then when others with proper knowledge post the real answer make another post saying 'see, got that sorted for you'. 2) If the thread is asking whether one model is better than another, say what you like (as you won't know), but be sure to throw the following in - Litchfield, T20, ultimate Subaru, don't you wish you could be hot like me! 3) Technical queries - Google is your friend. Search in Google and post the random sh1t that it (or if desperate Wikipedia) finds, but post it as if you personally know what the it means! Style over substance my friends 4) Failing all else post a reply saying you don't know, but someone will be along shortly who can help.... then say you have to go because your PM inbox is full of people wanting legal advice. Finally make sure to have a full on personality transplant if you post in the early hours of the morning ;) Good luck and welcome to Scoobynet! :lol1: :thumb: If any of the other regulars wish to add to this guide please be my guest :D |
dont forget say you want to make it a safe friendly place to post, yet when the witching hour strikes at 2 a.m start a baiting thread then ignore it while sober throughout the day only to return at the witching hour.
anyway im off now as somebody has pm'd me telling me im great and to ignore you. |
Please add how to tell if you are a newbie :thumb:
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Originally Posted by Athame1
(Post 11280130)
Please add how to tell if you are a newbie :thumb:
5. you are a newbie "if you spk like dis m8" and after 3 posts say "you wuldnt say dat 2 my face bruv id nock u out" |
6. Make sure you check your spelling before posting threads :D
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Mods, can you make this a Sticky .....
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7 . You WILL be given a hard time for the first 100 posts to we suss you out
Eg chav Dump valve intentions Want to sell your car without paying a fee Saying you have seen this car on Evilbay and it's really yours A closset Halfrauds fan Wear dodgy clothes Home made tattoo or even worse get one on holiday as a sovernere Txt and anti proper English campaigner Want to boast about street racing Want to complaine about a parking /speeding fine Once we are satisfied you are not one of the above we will sign you up and take you seriously :D |
Originally Posted by lordharding
(Post 11280160)
Once we are satisfied you are not one of the above we will sign you up and take you seriously........ maybe :D
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I was thinking of doing a rival thread about know all smart-arses who think they own SN , but I cant be bothered.
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Originally Posted by CharlySkunkWeed
(Post 11280169)
I was thinking of doing a rival thread about know all smart-arses who think they own SN , but I cant be bothered.
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Think I just make myself the self proclaimed saviour of SN and counteract all the negative posts with positives.I have very little mechanical knowledge , let alone Subaru knowledge , but I can at least point noobs to someone that does.
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Originally Posted by CharlySkunkWeed
(Post 11280184)
Think I just make myself the self proclaimed saviour of SN and counteract all the negative posts with positives.I have very little mechanical knowledge , let alone Subaru knowledge , but I can at least point noobs to someone that does.
that title has been claimed by a welshman:thumb: |
8. Feel free not to share that you are feeling down, depressed have a cold or your mate died. If you want sympathy of sympathy by proxy you need to join the forum for excess estrogen sufferers :)
9. If you`re thinking of starting a thread about how to fit flaps, please just kill yourself now. Please advise any mates about starting any subsequent threads about your passing as above :) |
10. if you have a wrx claim its far faster than the sti, ignore all facts to to prove the sti is the better model by using such stories as " it beats my mates,enzo,f40,veyron and i once raced an sti and i could here his turbo spooling as i did the 1/4 in 9 secs yo bruv.
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Originally Posted by tubbytommy
(Post 11280185)
that title has been claimed by a welshman:thumb:
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11. Be the first person ever to mention that SMR Engines are now trading as Ideal Engines and ripped you off on a replacement engine/gearbox. :)
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12. Don't be afraid to drag some random argument off of another thread in to the thread you are posting on ;)
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Dont forget that just renewing your tax disc could require a map update
Expect your car to blow up or break down every time its dynoed or a new part is fitted Always remember once you have finished (ruining) sorry tuning your Subaru that its value has plummeted as its no longer original Now its finished and your bored its time to sell it on...or in reality its time to split it into 1000 pieces and sell parts for the next eleventeen years |
And the final one dont buy a bloody hatch despite some claims they are not an impreza just a mazda 3.
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Originally Posted by tubbytommy
(Post 11280265)
And the final one dont buy a bloody hatch despite some claims they are not an impreza just a mazda 3.
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Originally Posted by Busterbulldog
(Post 11280267)
Oh yes the unwritten rule...always slag off better faster newer cars and remind the owners that they should regress 10 years and buy what they had then.
So you can return to impreza ownership? |
Originally Posted by tubbytommy
(Post 11280270)
Is that why you were trying to flog it.
Too return to impreza ownership? |
Originally Posted by Busterbulldog
(Post 11280273)
No dude I lost my job :(
Not good before Xmas. |
Originally Posted by tubbytommy
(Post 11280277)
Ahh sorry mate
Not good before Xmas. |
Originally Posted by Busterbulldog
(Post 11280283)
Its ok you weren't to know,not something you shout about when you put a car up for sale,besides I am working again just on massively less money...but also massively less grief so mustn't grumble eh
**** luck though mate :( |
Originally Posted by 53
(Post 11280284)
Oi rule 8. :p :D
**** luck though mate :( |
Originally Posted by Busterbulldog
(Post 11280291)
oops lol...but its ok I dont want sympathy
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Originally Posted by ditchmyster
(Post 11280320)
Too late you already have our deepest sympathy because you bought a hatch. :lol1:
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And don't forget to mention that the best place to buy a mint impreza, with all the extras and well modded is KTC:eek:
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Originally Posted by lordharding
(Post 11280160)
7 . You WILL be given a hard time for the first 100 posts to we suss you out
Eg chav Dump valve intentions Want to sell your car without paying a fee Saying you have seen this car on Evilbay and it's really yours A closset Halfrauds fan Wear dodgy clothes Home made tattoo or even worse get one on holiday as a sovernere Txt and anti proper English campaigner Want to boast about street racing Want to complaine about a parking /speeding fine Once we are satisfied you are not one of the above we will sign you up and take you seriously :D |
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